prayer journal

Prayer is an act of worship, submission, obedience, and admission of my condition where I embrace my need.   It is seeking communion with him rather than trying to acquire favors.  It is prayed in an attitude called importunity which is a condition of being troubled or persistent because of urgency.   It is petitionary prayer not declaration.

1. Adore – plunge self into His greatness until my heart becomes dazzled, 50% of the Lord’s prayer is adoring God, not my needs
2. Accept – thy will be done. You must not say I need something until you first say, but you know what I need
3. Ask – being so dependent upon him that you need him to provide
4. Adhering – make me like your son, not give me things

Prayer is abandoning my place in the center of my world and daily surrendering that place to God in heartfelt worship.  Prayer reminds me of who I am, who God is, and what life is all about.  Prayer is surrender to the reality that there is someone more ultimate than me and that life is not all about me.  It surrenders to the reality that I need help and that there is wisdom greater that mine.  It is surrendering my rights to live how I chose.   

True prayer happens at the intersection of surrender and celebration.  You surrender you claim on your life to the greater and wiser plans and purposes of God.  You submit your will to this will.  Then prayer is celebration.  You bask in the wonder of what it means that you actually have a heavenly Father.  You find joy in the reality that he has chosen to give you his kingdom.  You are blown away by the fact that he unleashes his almighty power to meet your needs.  You celebrate forgiving, rescuing, transforming, enabling, and delivering grace.  You find joy in you inclusion in his work of redemption.  You find hope in the glorious future that is to come.  You are amazed by the fact that because Immanuel has invaded your life by his grace, you are never, ever alone.  You find peace in the fact that grace means you are never left to the small resources of your own wisdom, righteousness, and strength.  You meditate on Gods glory and goodness, then celebrate.  You rejoice in the fact that you no longer have to look for life in the people, situations, and locations around you, but you’ve been give n life-life that is eternal.

Preach the gospel to myself every day because no one is more influential in my life than me because no one talks to me more than I do.  What have I been saying to myself or about myself?  What have I been saying to myself about God?  What have I been saying to myself about life, meaning and purpose, right and wrong, true and false, good and bad? Am I preaching to myself a gospel of aloneness, hopelessness, poverty, and inability or the true gospel of God’s presence, hope, mercy, forgiveness, rescue, love, transformation, power, and constant provision?  Am I preaching to myself a gospel that produces fear and timidity or one that propels me with courage and hope?  Am I preaching to myself a God who is distant, passive, and uncaring or of a God who is near, caring, and active?  Am I preaching to myself a gospel that produces panic because it seems like there are no answers to be found or the gospel that causes me to rest in his wisdom? God in His grace has given me His word so that I may preach to myself what is true in those moments when the only one talking to me is me.

PSALM 42 The psalmist pictures his soul thirsting for God like a deer pants after water.  He desired to appear before God (“to see His face”), to receive his blessing and favor in his presence.  To be in his presence is the ultimate reward for the person who is faithful to him.  His cries and tears became his only food which showed the depths of his grief.  He spoke to his soul in an attempt to bring comfort and security.    In answer to the questions focusing on his depression (Why are you cast down, O my soul?), he literally commands himself to hope in God, meaning to wait on Him during a time of crisis, trusting that He will answer prayer.  He was saying to himself that there was no reason for his depression if God was his help.  The fact that he repeated this several times shows the difficulty of internalizing this truth.

Father thank you for who you are, thank you for your goodness, your faithfulness, and for your grace, and thank you all that you have done for us.  Thank you for your free gift of salvation and for making a way so that we can draw near to you and your throne of grace in prayer, where you hear our requests, and where we can cast our worries and cares upon you (1 peter 5:7), renewing our strength and giving us rest for our weary soul.  May my prayer be set before you like incense.  (ps 141:2) and may my requests and concerns be consistent with your will and grounded in your promises, your character, and in your word. (james 4:3).   Thank you for giving us your spirit and for your (hesed) steadfast and unfailing love towards us which never ceases; and for your mercies that are new every morning (Lam 3:22).  Thank you for your patience with me and for meeting us where we are,  in our struggle, doubt and fear, for pursuing us when we wander, empowering us when we are weak, and for restoring us when are unfaithful.  Holy spirit fill me, so that the choices I make, and the counsel I give, would reflect your will and your way.     Help me to walk in the light, love without fear, hold fast to the truth, because you who calls are faithful.

8Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in You. Teach me the way I should walk, for to You I lift up my soul. 9Deliver me from my enemies, O LORD; I flee to You for refuge.a 10Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God. May Your good Spirit lead me on level ground. 11For the sake of Your name, O LORD, revive me. In Your righteousness, bring my soul out of trouble. 12And in Your loving devotion, cut off my enemies. Destroy all who afflict me, for I am Your servant. (ps 143)

Incline you ear, O Lord, and answer me, for I am poor and needy, preserve my life, gladden the soul of your servant, Give ear to my prayer; listen to my plea for grace.   In the day of my trouble I call upon you, for you answer me.  Teach me your way, O Lord, that I many walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart that I would fear your name.  I give thanks to you, O lord my God, with my whole heart, and I will glorify your name forever.  For great is your steadfast love toward me; you have delivered my soul from the depths of Sheol (ps 86)     

I ask for the knowledge and understanding of your will, so that I may walk worthy of you, being fruitful in every good work, increasing in the knowledge of who you are, strengthened by the power of your spirit, joyfully giving thanks in all things with patience and longsuffering, being rooted and grounded and in your love.  (Colossians 1:10-12 and Ephesians 3:16-18).  That my love will abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment, so that I may approve that which is excellent, and so that I may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Christ, to your glory and praise (phil 1:9-11)  

Help me to take no thought for tomorrow or to take thought for my life, what I shall eat or drink, or clothes which the nations seek after, but help me to seek first your kingdom and your righteousness, so all things will be added.  (matt 6:33)  Keep me for allowing my anxiety about an imagined tomorrow govern me and distract my attention from the only place your grace is available to me which is right here and now for today.  Help me to cast today’s anxieties about tomorrow on you and help me to receive the sufficient grace you have for me today.

MY AIM  AND PURPOSE IN LIFE

• “Man’s chief end is to glorify God, and to enjoy him forever, to know and delight in Him, and to be content and satisfied in Him“
• (“Hell and destruction are never full; so the eyes of man are never satisfied” (pr 27:20) It is a bottomless pit of lust, envy, and greed)
• …to do good works, to be fruitful,  (your primary creative & redemptive purpose) and to reflect more and more of Christ’s character and likeness 

Remind my heart that the reason I was created, my chief end and purpose, is to glorify you, to worship you, to know you, to bear your image, to enjoy and delight in you, to be content and satisfied in you, and to be in loving relationship with you.  You alone are worthy of my worship and praise.  I was made to live for you.  My heart was designed to be controlled by worship of you.  My inner security is meant to come from rest in you.  My sense of well-being is intended to come from a reliance on your wisdom, power, and love.  You are the peace I am looking for, the satisfaction my heart seeks, the rest that I crave, the joy that I long for, and the comfort my heart desires.  I pray that I will walk by faith and not by sight and that I will make it my aim to please you, knowing we must all appear before your judgement seat, to receive what is due for what we done in the body whether good or evil. (2 cor 5: 7-10).  That I will love you with all my heart, mind, soul, and strength, knowing that is what you require of us (Deut 10:12-13).  That I will fear you, act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly before you (Micah 6:8) in obedience, doing good works, bearing fruit, and reflecting more and more of your nature and character.  Remembering the “whole duty of man” is to fear you and keep your commandments (ecc 12:13), and remembering the ultimate purpose of obedience is joy, which is the fulfillment of knowing you whom I was built to love.    

For this is your will, my sanctification: that I abstain from sexual immorality; that I may know how to control my own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know you;(1 thess 4:3), and that I rejoice always, pray without ceasing, and that I give thanks in all circumstances ( 1 thess 5:16-18)

I count all things as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus as my Lord.  For you sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith-that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection. (phil 3:8-10).  I pray that I will not boast in wisdom, strength, or riches, but only that I know and understand you (jer 9:23).    The only way I can truly know you is by spending a lot of time with you, conversing with you, and observing you and truly loving you.  Help me to gain a more comprehensive and nuanced understanding of who you are.  Help me to see you more clearly, know you more intimately, and follow you more fully.  Help me to develop a deeper intimacy with you.  And may I not just be filled with head knowledge but may my heart be transformed into the likeness of your son.  Help me to be patient in this process remembering the most important things take a long time to grow and mature.

• 21“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. 22On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ 23And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’ (Matt 7)

Help me to forget what lies behind and strain forward to what lies ahead, pressing on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. (phil 3:13-14).  May I, like Paul run the race to receive the prize, not aimlessly, but like an athlete who has a single-minded focus and goal, to bring as many people as possible, from whatever station in life, to faith in the gospel. (1 cor 9:26)  I pray that I will do all things without grumbling or questioning, so that I may be a blameless and innocent child without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, and so I may shine as a light in this world of darkness, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain.  (Phil 2:14-18)

I pray will be found to be a wise, faithful, humble servant with my lamp burning brightly, abiding in you and living in a way that pleases you, so that when you appear, I will not be ashamed and will have confidence before you when you return.  I pray that I will live a life motivated by your promises, emboldened by your presence, and encouraged by your grace.  That my walk will be blameless, that I will do what is righteous, and that I will speak truth from my heart. (ps 15) That I will be a man of integrity, that is transparent, honest, and faithful to their word.    Help me to lead the life that you have assigned to me and to which you have called me.  (1 cor 6:17), and help me to lead a life of undivided devotion to you (1 cor 6:35).  Teach me your way Lord, that I may rely on your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart, one that is sincere and resolute, that I may fear your name (ps 86: 11) Help me to imitate you, walking wisely in love as a child of light, no longer walking in darkness.  Help me to discern what is pleasing to you.  Help me to make the best use of my time and to understand what your will is, being filled with your spirit and not with wine, giving thanks for all things, and submitting to others (Eph 5).  remembering without faith, it is impossible to please you; for he that comes to You must believe you exist and that you reward those who diligently seek you by faith (Hebrews 11:6) Help me to lay aside every weight and sin so I can run with endurance the race that is set before me, looking to your son, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him, endured the cross, despising the shame and is seated at the right hand of your throne (Heb 12:1-2)

May I present my body as living sacrifice to you, holy and acceptable to you, which is my spiritual worship.   Keep me from being conformed to this world and help me to be transformed by the renewing of my mind, so that by testing I may discern what is your will, and what is good and acceptable and perfect in your sight.  Keep me thinking more highly of myself than I ought to.  Help me to understand what my gifts are that you have given me so that I can cultivate them and better serve your body.   Help me to learn to love and serve others well.  Help me to be patient in suffering and rejoice in hope, constant in prayer, contributing to the needs of the saints and showing hospitality.  Help me to be rich in faith, established in heart, meek, who is a doer of the word and not just a hearer.  Let me be one through whom non-Christians can observe the love of your son Jesus.  Let me be One who is quick to hear and slow to speak, who loves my neighbor as myself, who visits the poor, widows, and orphans, abhorring what is evil, and holding fast to what is good.  Loving others with brotherly affection, Not slothful in zeal, fervent in spirit, serving you with joy.  Keep me from being wise in my own sight and from being haughty but rather associate with the lowly, never avenging myself, leaving wrath to you. (Rom 12).  Teach me to love with aggressive grace.

Help me to focus on your truth instead of the trials.  Help me to give thanks, instead of giving into fear.  Help me to choose joy, instead of anger.  Help me to trust in your power, instead of my plan.  Help me to elevate your name instead of my own.  Equip and empower me with your spirit so I can live the life you have called me to and so that I can so no to selfish desires, wrong thoughts, dangerous emotions, the world’s values, and my desire to control what only you can rule.  Help me to move forward and follow you with a strong and sturdy faith that cannot be shaken, in the midst of my fear, uncertainty, and inadequacies, trusting you with each step that I take, resting in your promises, provision, sovereignty, character, and faithfulness, relying on your strength and not my own, remembering that you are always with me, your hand is always upon me, your never stop watching me, your heart is for me, and you are always accomplishing your plans for me and through me. 

I pray that I will acknowledge you as sovereign and creator, that I will bow to your glory, submit to your plan, confess allegiance to your kingdom, rest in your provision, celebrate your grace, commit myself to a life of good works, that I will go where you have called me to go, that I will do what you have called me to do, and I will become who you have created me to be, and that you will allow me to be a part of what you are doing and not in the way of it.  And that you will use the brokenness and mess of my life to honor and glorify you and so that it will become a trophy of your grace.  Keep my heart from growing cold, bitter, distant, and hardened from the deceitfulness of sin.  Draw me near to you and help me to drive your truth deep into my mind and heart to uproot the lies.  When waves of loneliness, discouragement, frustration, anxiety, depression, shame, confusion, and fear roll over me, I run to you, and you breathe life into my heart and vitality to my soul.  When my hope is fading and my faith is weak, you are not impatient, and you never go frustrated. Help me to remember that I am never alone, because you go before me and you are with me, and that you will never leave nor forsake me, so I have no need to be afraid or discouraged (Deut 31:8).  May I always remember that you are good.  Your goodness is enduring.  Your faithfulness is unending.  That part of who you are will never change, but my understanding is limited, and that is where I ask you to strengthen my faith.  Strengthen my faith and deepen my trust in the areas where I just don’t understand.  Help me to remember that my prayers never go unheard, even though they may not be answered in the time I wish they were.  Assure my heart that you will receive glory and you will deepen my joy the more I trust you, know you, and look to you.  In spite of things that don’t make sense and are hard, help me to see a greater narrative, and would you comfort me in my pain, and would you join me in my tears.  Give me faith to live whatever circumstance I might be in, to your glory.  

SUBMITTING TO HIS LORDSHIP & AUTHORITY 
BOWING TO THE KING | TAKING UP MY CROSS | SERVANT – SLAVE -DOULOS

You came not be served, but to serve, and to give your life as a ransom for many. (matt 20:28)  You laid down your life for us, so that we would no longer live for ourselves, but for you who for our sake died and rose again (2 cor 5:15).  So I pray that I will deny myself and take up my cross and follow you wherever you go (matt 16:24) , and that your kingdom’s purposes would be greater than my desires, and that your agenda will be my agenda. May the desires of my heart align with your will for my life.    Free me from myself, and cause my selfish heart to find joy, satisfaction, motivation, and delight in doing the one thing I was given breath to do, which is to offer myself as a living sacrifice in service to you and to others.  You have purchased me with your blood (act 20:28), so I am no longer my own, I belong to you, so I am at your complete disposal to do your bidding.  You are my king, and you alone are worthy of my praise and worship, and all that we do is meant to be done for you.  I was made to worship you, and to walk in your ways, and to love and serve you with all my heart, mind, soul and strength, and to keep your commands (Deut 10:12), to do justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with you (Micah 6:8).  This is what you require from us, so I bow down before you, submitting my heart to your word, will, lordship, and authority, in complete loyalty, allegiance, and obedience, because following, obeying, serving and submitting to you is what I was created to do, so it is the only place where freedom can be found.  Where the spirit of the Lord is there is freedom (1 cor 3:17).  Freedom from condemnation, guilt, sin, death, the old covenant and blindness to the gospel, as well as freedom that gives me access to your loving presence.   Nothing I have belongs to me, they belong to you for your purposes, so I pray that I would be a faithful steward of the gifts, money, time, and resources that you have entrusted me with, so that I can make an eternal difference in the lives of others, and so I can enter into the joy of my master and here you say “well done, good and faithful servant”.

I confess to a wondering fickle heart who is susceptible to the enemies lies so help me to live within your wise and loving boundaries that I have been designed to live in, and to help me to remember that life and freedom is found inside these boundaries, not in discovering what is outside them.  I ask that love for your law would rule my heart.  Keep me from saying that you are Lord, but live as though I am.  Remind my heart that it is not how much we know, it is how much we submit to you and apply your words to our life.  Keep me from making a god that suits my own needs, one that is just a projection of my own sinful heart, because you are not my assistant who is there to serve me, or who is someone I can control and negotiate with, and who I use as a supplement,  you will be nothing less, than my all wise, and all sufficient, sovereign Savior and king who I bow down before and serve.  Coming under your loving lordship and authority means an end to my rights, as well as my wrongs, so I offer you my whole life, mind, will, and emotions.

HIS WORD

If you are the source of life, then your word will give life.  If you are wholly truthful, then your word cannot error.  If you are glorious, then your word is a treasure.  Your word is like a deep, deep mine, and jewels rich and rare are hidden in its mighty depths for every searcher there.   I love and delight in you word.  It is more valuable to me than gold or silver, therefore I will rejoice in it and treasure it in my heart like one who has found great treasure.  It is sweeter than honey (103) and more valuable to me than gold (72).  Give me the energy for study of your word that comes from a deep sense of the value of what I will find there. (ps 119).    Your words are pure as silver tried in a furnace, like gold refined 7 times. (ps 12:6)  Strengthen me with it, make me to understand it, and teach me to apply it in my life.  Your word and law is the perfect guide for life, so may I keep your law and instructions diligently, may I attend to them carefully, watch over them, and treasure them so that I can find your way and so I can reflect more of your character. 

I stand in awe and rejoice in you word.  Great peace have those who love and keep your word.  Help me to be not just a hearer but a doer of you word. (james 1:22) . 

Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock.  And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.  And everyone who hears these words and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand.  The rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it. (Matthew 7:24 – 26). 

Let your word be not merely something I believe but something that dwells richly inside me, so it reshapes all my thinking and feelings and even the very foundations of my heart.  And so I can be more freed from the crippling effects of sin, fear, self-pity, self-consciousness, and discouragement, and so that my thoughts, emotions, desires, choices, motivations, and intent of all that I do, be shaped and molded by your word, spirit, love, truth, grace, and compassion.  Help me to encounter you in your Word, seeing more and more of who you really are by faith, so I can be transformed more and more into your likeness.

The unfolding of your words give light, they are a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path, and they impart understanding to the simple. (ps 119:130, 105) in the midst of the darkness of this world.  Remembering every time Satan tried to envelop Christ in darkness, He used Scripture after Scripture to dispel it.   He answered Satan’s assaults with passages from Deuteronomy.  As He was carrying the cross he cited Hosea, and as he was dying in agony he quoted the Psalms.   Let me be so immersed in our word that your words spring to my mind, as they did for Jesus, interpreting my moment, guiding my choices, and strengthening my heart. 

It was good for me to be afflicted, so that I may learn your statutes.  (71)  I know, O Lord, that your rules are righteous, and that in faithfulness you have afflicted me (175).  This is my comfort in my affliction, your promises give life (50).  Help me to be like the psalmist who found comfort both in your promises to him good through his affliction, and your promise to ultimately deliver him from it.  And let that lead me into loving your word even more (167).  May it become the sum of all truth to me (160), a light unto my path (105), and my refuge.   Give me strength to meditate upon it throughout the day (97).    Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I have kept your word (ps 119:67). 

 Your word is living and active, so let it search, examine, and warn me, and let it remove any wicked way within me, leading me to the way everlasting…cleansing, washing, purging me, and renewing the joy of my salvation.   May my heart be receptive and attentive to your word and help me to properly understand and apply your word in my life, making your principles into realities and your word flesh.   May your word and your law be the apple of my eye, and may it be written on my heart, internalizing it until it directs my actions.  Your word and law give me wisdom and keep my feet from every evil path.  May it shape my character and conduct.  Your word has medicine for every wound.  Neither scholarship or research or anything else can tell me as much about the human heart, human nature, and the ways of the world, as your word, so let my heart savor every letter.  

Your Holy scriptures are able to make us wise for salvation through faith in Christ. All Scripture is breathed by You and is useful for instruction, for conviction, for correction, and for training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be complete, fully equipped for every good work (2 Tim 15-17).  I pray that I will make every effort to present myself approved to You, an unashamed workman who accurately handles the word of truth (2 Tim 2:15).  Your word is your love letter to us, and it will never return empty, or void, and it will always accomplish what you desire, whether it is teaching, correcting, training, leading us to you, revealing our sin, or some other good and profitable end.  

Your word is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it pierces even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow. It judges the thoughts and intentions of the heart. 13Nothing in all creation is hidden from Your sight; everything is uncovered and exposed before your eyes, to whom we must give account. (Heb 4:12-13).  The only reason I can stand before the searching and exposing mirror of your word, unafraid, with courage and hope is because all that has been exposed has been fully and completely covered by the shed blood of your son.   

Your word is the primary means by which You present yourselves to us; It is the way we can know you and remain in faithful relationship with you.  It is clearest and ultimate revelation of who you are.  Your word is how we can be sure we are encountering the real God as you truly are and not some god we imagine you to be or want you to be.  Your word is infallible and authoritative.  I can’t know you intimately if I don’t treat everything you say as right.   Jesus is your Word.  Jesus’s very basis of his life and what made him who he was, was your word.   Your word does not simply conform to some other external standard of “truth”, but rather it is “truth” itself; it embodies “truth” and it therefore is the standard of truth against which everything must be tested and compared.  Strengthen me with your word and sanctify me with your truth. (jn 17:17)     

The Shema: referenced by Jesus in Mark that it is the greatest command.  He desires this more than sacrifices.

4Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is One. 5And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart (the seat of the emotions generally and of love in particular;) and with all your soul and with all your strength (understanding).b 6These words I am commanding you today are to be upon your hearts. 7And you shall teach them diligently to your children and speak of them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8Tie them as reminders on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9Write them on the doorposts of your houses and on your gates.  (Deut 6:4-9, 11:18-20)

Help me to live by faith, and not my feelings.  Keep me from listening to my feelings and help me to start ruling them by telling them what is true.  My moods often spring from something I am believing, truth or lies influencing me at the time, and they frequently function as belief gauges, indicators that tell me what is currently fueling or syphoning away my hope.  Help me to discern that my most difficult emotions, bad attitudes, and foolish actions come from losing my grip of who you are in that moment, so teach me to focus on you. When I fly into a disorienting spiritual storm and I lose sight of familiar reference points and my sensory subjective perceptions become unreliable, and I can’t discern up from down, teach me to place my faith in the objective instruments of your promises and warning in the Scriptures, listening to the prompts of your holy spirit. Teach me to trust in you with all my heart and to not lean on my own understanding. In all my ways acknowledge you so that you will make my paths straight (prov 3:4-6)

 Help me to love you with all my heart, and all my soul, and all my mind, and with all my strength which is your greatest command (mark 12:30)  Help me to remember what is real, important, and true.  Help me to overcome the worlds opinion, my busy schedule, my distracted mind, and my stubborn heart, so making knowing you experientially, and serving you obediently, will be the main focus of my life.  Give me strength for sustained reflection in your word and give me wisdom to be able apply your word in my life.  Help me to remember what is worth remembering and put away what  I need to forget. Help me to deepen my grasp of your kingdom, goodness, and love for me, so that I can see, taste, and savor you, and so I can know you more intimately and more fully.  Give me strength to reflect on your sacrifice.  May it always be on my mind.  Help me to get all other things out so I can reflect, engage, think, and look at what it means.  Knowledge of you in Christ is my greatest delight.  Help me to see you as you are, so that I will praise you as I should. I pray my heart will seek your face and that your beauty will attract my heart, and capture my imagination, and that I will remember your promises and faithfulness upon which all my hope, trust, and confidence rests.   Help me to consciously worship you all day so that every good thing I would see as a gift from your heart, and every bad thing as a test from your hand.  Give me a moment by moment God-centeredness.

Biblical faith allows me to examine reality and the brokenness of the world but makes you my meditation in the midst of my trouble so I ask for the strength to meditate on your glory, your power, your wisdom, your grace, your faithfulness, your righteousness, your patience, your commitment to your eternal promises to me, and what you have done for me, instead of my problems and my circumstances.  Biblical faith is so in awe of your glory that it enables me to look at the darkest realities of life and not be afraid.  Peace is found in times of trouble, not by trying to figure everything out, but in worship of You who has everything figured out already.  Give me patience and habits of mind that can mark and notice, savor and relish, and inwardly digest your words so they dwell in me richly.  Great peace have those who love your law, and nothing can make them stumble. (ps 119:165)   All your words are true; all your righteous laws are eternal (ps 119:160) Incline my heart unto your testimonies and not to covetousness (ps 119:36,37).  Keep my eyes from beholding vanity and keep me from being entertained by things which you died for.  Let the words of my mouth and the thoughts and meditations of my heart be pleasing in your sight. (ps 19:14).  I pray that you will be the center of my mind’s attention and my hearts affection, and that the eyes and gaze of my heart will be fixed upon the beauty of who you are, and on your kingdom, righteousness, faithfulness, power, presence, promises, and provision, and not based upon what my eyes see or what my mind understands. Strengthen my faith and give me the strength to keep my eyes fixed upon you, so that I can walk through the storms of life without sinking as Peter did.  Help me to set my mind on things that are above, not things that are on earth, where Christ is, seated at your right hand (col 3:1-2).  You have made known to me the paths of life, and in your presence is fullness of joy, and at your right hand there are pleasures forevermore (ps 16:11).   Keep me from conforming to this world, and renew my mind so I can be transformed and so I can discern what is your good, acceptable, and perfect will (rom 12:2).  Keep me from becoming anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer, supplication, and thanksgiving I pray I will make requests known to you so your peace, which passes all understanding will guard my heart and mind in Christ Jesus (phil 4:6-7) You are the God of peace, so give me the strength to dwell on things that are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous, and praiseworthy, (phil 4:8) holding every thought captive in your name, remembering that you keep him in perfect peace, those whose mind is stayed upon you, because he trusts in you our everlasting rock. (Isaiah 26).  

Allow your gospel seed to take deep roots in my heart, so that I will become like a tree planted by streams of living water, drawing upon, feeding upon, and saturating my heart in your word, allowing me to bear fruit to you, and so that even in the fruitless winters, I am still growing, putting my roots down deeper, getting thicker, in order to produce even more fruit to you the next season.  Remembering this is how I take refuge in your arms.  This how I find strength, and rest, and how I cultivate your love in my heart.   Prune those things out of my life that aren’t bearing fruit to you, so I can become more fruitful. 

Help me to not love just in word and speech, but in action and truth. So I will know that I belong to the truth, and so I can assure my heart in Your presence, and so that I may have confidence on the day of judgment;:  love consists in this: not that we loved You, but that You loved us and sent Your Son as the atoning sacrificed for our sins.  11 if You so loved us, we also ought to love one another.  We lovee because You first loved us.  (1 Jhn)  When I am living for myself, the call to love others is always a burden and duty, but true, humble, joyful, and perseverant love is born out of worshipful gratitude.    4Love is patient, and it is kind. It does not envy or boast.  It is not prideful, rude, self-seeking, or easily angered, and it keeps no account of wrongs. 6Love takes no pleasure in evil but rejoices in the truth. 7It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8Love never fails.  (1 cor 13).  Love lends and expects nothing in return.  Love is self-sacrificing, generous, and unconditional.  Love binds everything together in perfect harmony (col 3:12), love is the fulfilling of the Law (Rom 13:10).  We come to know you and love you through keeping your commands and keeping your word.  That is how love is perfected in us, but whoever does not, the truth is not in him.  (1 john 2:4-5) (jhn 14:15) Your love does not compromise your truth. Love and truth are bound together.  They do not stand in opposition to one another.  Love without holiness is mere sentiment (which is just a thought, opinion, or idea based on a feeling).  Righteousness and Law without grace will turn me into a pharisee, but Your gospel keeps truth and love together. 

PROVISION | UTTER DEPENDANCE | NEED
 THE TABLE  | FEEDING OFF HIS WORD 

• I am the bread of life, whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst.  (jn:6:35)
• Matt 6:11 (303 + 308) “Give this day our daily bread” (he wants his disciples to live a state of constant dependence on his provision). 
• Remove far from me vanity and lies; give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with food convenient for me:  Lest I be full and deny thee, and say; Who is the Lord? or lest I be poor, and steal, and take your name in vain. (prov 30:8-9)
• Unless you eat the flesh of the son of man and drink his blood, you have no life in you.  Whoever feeds on my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up the last day.  Whoever feeds on my flesh and drinks of my blood, abides in me, and I in him (jn 5:53-56)

Remind my heart that we do not live on bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from your mouth, (matt 4:4) and that I can’t know you except through your word, and through keeping your commands, because a person’s word is the clearest and ultimate revelation of who they are.  You reveal yourself to us through your word, and your word became flesh through your son, whose body was broken (bread) and whose blood was shed (cup) for us.  You alone can fill my hunger and satisfy the void in my heart.  You alone can quench my thirst that my soul longs for.    May I never forget the great cost and the depths he went to, so that I could be brought into your kingdom, and so that I could have a place at your table, not because of my own righteousness, but because of your sons.   I pray I will approach with right-less assertiveness, taking up both the offer and challenge, intaking, consuming, and feasting upon who you are, so that it will nourish my heart and weary soul.    

Help me to remember how utterly dependent I am upon you for everything in my life, especially when things are going well, and how needy I am, but that I have all I need in You so help me to take things one day at a time and help me to remember that you have given us all we need for each day, and all things that pertain to life and godliness.  (2 pet 1:3) You provide us with shelter, clothing, food, and water which is all we need in order to do what you have called us to do, and to become who you have created us to be, which is to be formed into the likeness of your son.   You provide for us and give us everything we need just like a loving father gives his children everything that they need.   You know what I need, when I need it, and how to deliver it.  You did not promise to deliver what I desire, but you are committed to giving me what I need.  No good thing will you withhold from those that walk upright (ps 84:11).   You give us what we need, not what we deserve, and my greatest need is a restored relationship with you, which you supplied through the person and work of your son.   So help me to not confuse what I want with what I actually need, because you alone are the only thing I need to survive and thrive.  I only need your all-powerful fatherly love and care.  Everything else is expendable. Faith looks at the wrath bearing, justice satisfying, sin atoning death of your son and joyfully says, “yes” that is what I need.  Thank you for not only providing for our physical needs and securing our pardon from sin, but also for restoring us to fullness of life and for bringing us festival joy.

DRAWING UPON WELL OF SALVATION
AND LIVING WATER

Remind my heart that my salvation is complete, and that the work is finished, so that I can draw upon the wells of your salvation and living water, (Isaiah 12) through prayer, meditating, pondering, reflecting upon, and internalizing your word, and remembering all your works.  Loving and serving you with all my heart, mind, soul, and strength. (Deut 6:5, Mark 12:30, Luke 10:27, Matt 22:37) Filling all gospel gaps in my heart, by drawing out the implications of your truths and claims, until I gain clarity and understanding, & until my cold, wandering, selfish heart becomes set on fire and captured by the beauty of who you are.

NARROW, STRAIGHT PATHS (TRUE, RIGHT, JUST)

LUKE 3:  4As it is written in the book of the words of Esaias the prophet, saying, The voice of one crying in the wilderness, Prepare you the way of the Lord, make his paths straight.  5Every valley shall be filled, and every mountain and hill shall be brought low; and the crooked shall be made straight, and the rough ways shall be made smooth;

Order my steps in your word (ps 119:133) and make straight paths for my feet.  Keep me from turning to the right hand or left (josh 1:7) because wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction and many there be which go therein but straight is the gate, and narrow is the way which lead to life, and few people find it.  (matt 7:14)  

WALK OF FAITH
SHEEP FOLLOWING THE SHEPHERD

Help me to imitate you, walking wisely in love as a child of light, no longer walking in darkness.  Help me to discern what is pleasing to you.  Help me to look carefully at how I walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil, not being foolish but understanding what your will is, not being drunk with wine, but filled with spirit, singing and making melody to you in my heart, giving thanks always and for everything to you, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ (eph 5:1, 15-21)  Father, I put my hope and trust in you.  You are the God of my salvation, and my shepherd, so I ask that you show me your ways, and guide me in your truth, and that I will learn to do your will.  Quite my fearful heart so I can hear, listen, heed, and be obedient to your voice.  Lead, guide, guard, and direct my path, and lead me to the fountain of living waters.  Keep me from walking in darkness.  I pray that I will not enter into temptation, but that I will draw near with a true heart and full assurance of faith, casting off the works of the flesh, darkness, and every weight and sin that so easily besets me, (heb 12:1) the lust, envy, covetousness, wickedness, greed, pride, selfishness, jealousy, anger, bitterness, and strife, and that I will put on Christ (rom 13:14), walking in the spirit, following after, patience, love, joy, peace, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, meekness, gentleness, and self-control, against which there is no law, and so that I may bear the fruits of your spirit, glorifying you in all that I do, and showing evidence of my submission to your spirits work within me.  May I remember that I can’t bear fruit apart from you, so I pray that I will walk and abide in your love, truth, and spirit, so that the law of righteousness and truth be fulfilled in me, walking in your spirit and not after the flesh.   Keep me from desiring vain glory and envying others and give me the strength to bear other people’s burdens (gal 5).  1Rid yourselves, therefore, of all malice, deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander. 2Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, 3now that you have tasted that the Lord is good. (1Peter 2)

FIRM FOUNDATION | ROCK & FORTRESS | REFUGE
Unwavering, Upright, Straight, Firm, Resolute, Stable, Secure,
Fixed, Settled, Smooth, Straight, Established, Fixed, Still, Steadfast

MEMORIAL STONES OF REMEMBRANCE 

• 5And Joshua said to them, “Pass on before the ark of the LORD your God into the midst of the Jordan, and take up each of you a stone upon his shoulder, according to the number of the tribes of the people of Israel, 6that this may be a sign among you. When your children ask in time to come, ‘What do those stones mean to you?’ 7then you shall tell them that the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the LORD. When it passed over the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. So these stones shall be to the people of Israel a memorial forever.” 24so that all the peoples of the earth may know that the hand of the LORD is mighty, that you may fear the LORD your God forever.”    (Joshua 4)
• Memorials are powerful because they take us back to moments in tiem where Gods power and provision were clearer than they are at the present moment.

May I keep as stones of remembrance the darkness you have delivered me from, and how broken, empty, and lost I was, and yet in the midst of my rebellion and unfaithfulness, while I was wasting away in my sin, you pursued me, and met me where I was at, because of your great love for me. You came from the highest of highs, to save me in my lowest of lows. I was a sheep that went astray and turned to my own way, but you laid my iniquity on your son, so that my sins could be forgiven and so I could be reconciled back to you. 

You lifted me up out of the pit and set my feet upon a rock, and put a new song in my mouth, and I am not who I used to be because of your perfect love.  (ps 40:1) You healed and restored me, and gave me new life, mission, meaning, and purpose.  Your grace has redefined my identity, redirected my purpose, rescued my thoughts, reshaped my desires, and reformed my living.  Before I was afflicted, I went astray, but now I have kept your word (ps 119:67) and I put all my hope, trust, and confidence in you.  You have chastened me sore (disciplined me severely) but did not give me over to death. I shall not die, but live, and declare your works.  Open to me the gates of righteousness and I will enter.  I will praise you, for you have healed me and become my salvation.  (ps 118:17-19).  I will rejoice and be glad in your steadfast love, because you have seen my affliction: you have known the distress of my soul, and you have not delivered me into the hand of the enemy; you have set my feet in a broad place. (ps 31:7-8)

Before, I was dead in my sins, unable to respond to you, but I pray now that I will respond to what you have done and accomplished for me on my behalf, with testimony, praise, and submissive obedience, which is why you called out your people from among the nations.  I pray that I will not neglect the gift you have so freely given me, and that I will work out my salvation with fear and trembling, (phil 2:12), not working for but applying what I have already been given, into every nook and cranny of my life.  Help me to not forget all your benefits (ps 103:2) so fear, anger, anxiety, and discouragement don’t take root.  You forgive all my sins and heal my diseases; you redeemed my life from the pit, and you crown me with love and compassion, and you satisfy my desires with good things, so my youth is renewed like the eagles (psalm 103).  You are infinitely beautiful and satisfying and the reason my soul was made.  There are more pleasures and more eternal joys in your presence than anything that this world could offer, and because I know that sin has lost its dominion over me.  Your grace is undeserved, so I should be humble.  Your grace is costly, so I should be holy and loving.  Your grace is unconditional, so I should be at peace.  

Ephraim fell into idolatry and was divorced by you, because they forgot that they had been cleansed from their past sins, and they failed to remember your works, so I pray for a heart that is constantly vitalized by deliberately remembering your costly sacrifice and the depth he went to earn our salvation, and that all life changing love is substitutionary sacrifice, emptying, pouring ourselves out for others in order to make them whole, as you did for us.   You died for all, so that we would no longer live unto ourselves, but to him, who died and rose again (2 cor 5:15).  

• ²⁷ My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. ²⁸ I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. ²⁹ My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father’s hand.³⁰ I and the Father are one.” (John 10)

We are utterly lost in our sin and can contribute nothing to our salvation.  A sheep loses its direction continually in a way a cat or dog never does.  When sheep see grass no matter where it is, no matter how steep or dangerous the spot, they just go for the grass, even if it is a place that is impossible to climb down from,.  So they go and eat until the grass is gone and then, they either have to be rescued or else they plunge to their death.  Even when you find a lost sheep, the lost sheep brushes to and fro and will not follow you home, so when you find it, you must seize it, throw it to the ground, tie its hind and front legs together, put it over your shoulders and carry it home.  This is the only way to save a lost sheep.  If we are feeding on anything besides Jesus (resting our hearts deepest hopes on something else besides him), we are like a sheep on a ledge.

In your grace you wrestled me to the ground, took away all my selfish desires and dreams, put me on your shoulders and carried me home.  I was infinitely lost, yet infinitely valued by you, and you stopped at nothing to bring me home.

IDENTITY IN CHRIST 
MY VALUE, SELF WORTH, SIGNIFICANCE

Now my identity, value, significance, and self-worth, come from what you accomplished for me on my behalf in Christ Jesus, and that I am chosen, loved, valued, accepted, and delighted in by you, which is the only pair of eyes in the universe that matters.  This is where I find my true joy.   There is nothing I can do, to be any more loved and accepted by you than I already am.  

• I no longer need to justify that I matter by looking down on others, saying my life has value because I am not like them
• I no longer need for others to perceive me as successful in order to feel significant
• I no longer need to be desired or praised by others in order to feel worth.
• I no longer have to work in the hope of getting an identity, I work in celebration of the identity that in Christ I have been given
• I no longer need to search for myself
• I no longer need to grasp for meaning for my life or purpose for what I do.
• I no longer need to hope for inner peace or well being
• I no longer need to hope that someone or something will give me joy
• I no longer need to measure my potential based on my own track record
• I no longer need to prove or validate myself anymore based off my achievements, accomplishments, performance, merit, or based off other people’s opinions of me, or any type of relative status, which is always fluctuating up and down, leaving me restless and tossed about like the waves of the sea, serving as its own form of prison, bondage, and slavery.  
• I no longer need to try to control other people’s opinions of me, or try to cover and hide my shame, guilt, fears, and inadequacies with a fig leaf, because I have been clothed with his righteousness, which gives me true rest, freedom, and security. 
• I no longer need to work for an identity, because now I work from the new identity that you have given me. 
• I no longer need any of these things because grace has connected me to my redeemer and has named me as your child.

Each one of my days has been written in your book before one of them ever came to be, and my heart has been in your sight long before my first breath.   The very hairs on my head are numbered and I am more valuable to you than many sparrows. (Matt 10:30)   You have formed me, and I have been fearfully and wonderfully made by you.  Remind my heart that when you find me “in Christ”, you see me as beautiful.  Let me grow in the knowledge that I am completely accepted, fully known, and fully loved by you “in Christ”, despite all of my personal flaws and failures.  “God loves Todd, Todd Loves God”.   I am unknown in the eyes of the world, but well known by you. You know me to the bottom, nevertheless you love me to the skies.   Your love for me is not a result of my character but a demonstration of yours.  Let my heart fully grasp that my salvation and standing with you is not based on my works or my own righteousness, but on your son’s, and that it is a gift to be received, not earned or achieved which frees me from having to measure up to your standard in order to garner your love, because Jesus accomplished all that needed to be done on our behalf.  

 Help me to not be so self-conscious or care what others think of me, remembering how accepted I am in Christ, so I will have the freedom and poise necessary to live without fear.  Help me to overcome my insecurities and lack of self-confidence, and fear of other’s disapproval or rejection.  Remind me that my identity is tied to what I believe is most important, what I really want, what I really believe offers me hope, what I orient my life around, and what I love the most.  It is derived from the person or thing (god) that I believe has the greatest power to determine my purpose, value, and happiness.  You have faithfully designed insecurity as a warning indicator that something is wrong with what I understand about who you say I am.

(Think out the implication) If you are my father, you know everything, you are in absolute control of history, you love me infinitely, and everlastingly, and would do anything for my good…and if this is who you are to me, and that is who I am to you, then I have no need to worry or to be fearful.  Worry and fear come when I forget what you accomplished for me in Christ Jesus.  You have defeated sin, so that it can no longer condemn me, and you have defeated death, so that I can be assured of my resurrection.  So may my fear of you overwhelm and control my heart, to protect me from the paralyzing and debilitating fear of other things.    For as far as the heavens are above the earth, so great is your love for those who fear you; as far as the east is from the west, so far have you removed our transgressions from us.  (ps 103:11,12).  So calm, settle, and silence my fearful heart with the unfailing and immutable promises of your scripture.   Fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom (prov 9:10) and blessed is the one who fears you and delights greatly in your commands (ps 112:1), so may I fear you and you alone and may that fear overwhelm and control my heart, because you are perfect love, and perfect love casts out fear, (1 John 4:18) and will protect me from the paralyzing and debilitating fear of other things.  Keep from ever trying to use your grace to enhance my reputation, and keep me from feeding off public admiration, and being lifted up in pride.  Keep me from using godliness for a means to worldy gain, the gain of wealth and status the world admires and envies.

• 8/18/24 
  • While serving in the learning center I lead a prayer for 6th grade and prayed they will grow, mature, and progress in the faith. 
  • Then in small group prayed for Phil.  Afterwards he said how humble I am. 
  • Then I went walking at Percy Warner and saw baby stroller after baby stroller and I just threw up my hands and said “what gives, what are you trying to show me?”.
    • Immediately a butterfly landed on my leg. 
      • 
      • A butterfly symbolizes transformation which reminded me that ultimately he is using all this tokeep me humble, to remind me of the mercy I have been given, to draw me closer to him and to help me grow, mature, and transform into his likeness.
      • For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; (1 thess 4:3) 
  • In the 6th verse of Phil: He who began a work in us will bring it to completion at the day of Christ.
    • the verse I gave Enoch (who walked with God) and Wesley (holiness) when we went through the book of Phil.
  • Phil 2:3 In humility (lowliness of mind) count others more significant than myself.  
  • Matt 18:1-4 Whoever humbles themselves like this child is the greatest in the kingdom 
    • 

• • • Toddler
  • 1 Pet 5:5-6 You resist the proud and give grace to the humble.  Humbleyourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:
  • Prov 29:23 A man’s pride shall bring him low: but honour shall uphold the humblein spirit.

I pray that I will clothe myself with humility toward others remembering You oppose the proud but give grace to the humble.  Humbling myself under your might hand so that at the proper time I may be exalted, casting all of my anxieties on you, because you care for me.  ( 1pet 5:5-7)  Keep me from thinking about greatness in terms of human endeavor, accomplishment, and status and help me to have the humility of a child that consists of childlike trust, vulnerability, and realizing that I can do nothing apart from you and your fatherly resources. Help me to remember who I am and what I have been given as your child.  Help me to live out of the joy and stability of knowing that I am your child, and heir, and that in Christ, you delight in me, so I will not be enslaved to applause, approval, and praise from others. Keep me from fearing man which is a snare and strengthen my faith and trust in you (prov 29:25).

When my focus is inward, I became enslaved to perceptions and pursuits of success, beauty, competency, security, and a coveted reputation, and in the process I heap upon myself burdens that I can’t bear.  Then I fall into shame from not meeting the standard.  Jesus sets me free from the shame of not being great which allows me to see myself as I truly am, which is someone who is very needy and who desperately needs you to serve me in every possible way.  Redirect my focus on serving you and serving others.  Help me to become less selfish, less self-pitying, less vain, less sensitive to criticism and other people’s opinion of me, and help me to become more joyful, content, and wise, doing nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility considering others better than myself, looking out for the interest of others, taking on the nature of a servant as you did (phil 2:3). 

True greatness is seen in the loving humility of those who like your son, seek’s less to be served but to serve. The way to save and preserve my life is to lose it.  The way to find myself is to lose myself in service to you and to others.   If I look for or try to find myself (or my “true” self), I will only find in the long run, hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay, but when I look to Christ, I will find him and everything that my heart truly seeks and needs will be found, which is joy, peace, love, security, and rest.    Help me to not think less of myself, but thinking of myself less often, remembering your divine selflessness, in that you emptied heaven of your greatest treasure to save us, your son emptied himself of his glory on the cross, and your holy spirit points away from himself to the person and work of your son.    

Mark 10: But whoever would be great among you must be your servant,44and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. 45For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

SEEING MYSELF ACCURATELY

COMPARING WHAT I AM IF LEFT TO MYSELF

• (flesh/fallen nature/dead in sins)
• To Confront/Convict/Confess/Humble
• A Sober warning/ Tan Hide
• To keep from being lifted up & prideful
• Convinced as a transgressor
• Under Crushing Weight of the Law

I am a complete moral failure with a desperately wicked heart.  My sins are many & my debt is great, & I am blind, naked, wretched, depraved, evil, wicked, poor, spiritually bankrupt, sick, lame, weak, & I have absolutely nothing to offer you.  You have seen every impure thought I have ever had & every secret sin I have ever committed.  I am a liar, thief, adulterer, idolater, blasphemer, and covetous at heart.  I am self-focused, prideful, insecure, inconsistent, limited, and confused.  I am corrupt, filthy, unclean, impure, defiled, stained, and unfit to be in your holy presence.  Nothing good dwells in me. I am broken, weak, undeserving, dead in my sins & trespasses, unable to respond to you, deserving nothing but your wrath, judgement, condemnation, & separation from your life-giving presence.   I was alienated, lost, alone, having no hope.  I have no resume to hold before you, no track record of accomplishments, no letters of commendation, & no rights of birth or ethnicity. I hold nothing that would place you in my debt, nothing that could curry your favor, & nothing that would obligate you.    My good works are like filthy rags in your sight.  So I approach you with no argument in my mind or words to offer in my defense & I stand before your throne of judgement with shoulders bent & hands that are empty, naked, guilty, undeserving, broken & weak, falling completely short of your righteous standard & the only thing I have earned is death.

 

—

 

 

WITH WHO HE IS & WHO I AM IN CHRIST

• (spirit/born again/alive in Christ)
• To Encourage/Comfort/Celebrate
• Glorious Hope/Warm Heart
• To keep from self-loathing 
• Forgiven
• Burden made light

But I am not afraid because I lay at your feet on the threshing floor, with rightless assertiveness as Ruth did, coming to you with no conditions, bringing only my own neediness, trusting only in your righteousness, and that what you did, you did for me.  You are my redeemer and because of your grace, you have delivered me from sin, death, and darkness.  You have purchased and redeemed me with a steep price, so I am no longer a slave to sin or a child of your wrath, but rather I am now a child of your grace, whom you have declared innocent, righteous, blameless, and who has been justified in your sights and in your courts.  I am no longer alienated because I have been brought near by the blood of Christ.   I am no longer dead in trespasses because I have been made alive and my sins have been covered and atoned for through your son’s precious blood that was shed.  My debt has been paid for and forgiven through his costly sacrifice.  My sins have been blotted out and removed as far as the east is from the west.  I have been clothed in his righteousness and you have given me eyes to see.  You have covered your servant with your wings.  You have given me the free gift of eternal life and I now have eternal riches and an inheritance because of what he did for me.  I have been made clean through your word.  I am now chosen, pardoned, accepted, loved, and delighted in by you.  You have redeemed, delivered, healed, sustained, and restored me.  You have given me new life, mission, meaning, and purpose, and I now am a new creation in you because of your perfect love, with a new heart, new desires, and new affections.

Help me to stand firmly on the foundational truths and realities that I am both a sinner and a child of your grace.  I confess the blindness of my understanding, the stubbornness of my will, the foolishness of my thought life, and the addiction of my heart to the things of this world.  I am false and full of sin, but you are full of grace and truth.  Sin still lives inside me, but you are abundant in mercy.  Although I am worse off than I could possibly understand, your grace is more amazing than I could ever imagine, so humble my pride to the dust, and raise me to the heavens out of my despondency, remembering the way up, is first go down.  Confront me with my foolishness, failure, and everything I am not, so that I would run after everything I could be, and to you who is wisdom and righteousness.   Keep me from focusing on other peoples sin, the specks in their eyes, and help me to be more focused on removing the log out of my own eye.

This is the posture of every truly redeemed person, so I pray this will serve to confront my pride, to convict, and as a sobering reminder of my condition apart from you, and to show how much I need a savior, so that I can more greatly appreciate the grace you have extended to me.   I have to see myself as hopeless and helpless if left to myself, so that it will initiate my pursuit of your grace.  Hopelessness is the doorway to hope.  Help me to see the impossibility of my sin, and the totality of the solution found in Christ.

Help me to always see and compare who I was, what I am apart from you in the flesh, and how far I have fallen, with who you are, and who I am now in Christ, as I walk in your spirit, and help me to hold these truths in tension together, so that I may see myself accurately in light of your cross, keeping me from being lifted up in pride, self-righteousness, hypocrisy, and self-indulgence, or wallowing in self-loathing and self-hate, allowing me to interact with others in true humility, meekness, and grace.

Seeing myself this way shifts my complaint, entitlement, and disappointment into gratitude, need, and thankfulness.  You have bought me and ransomed me with a steep price, and I am not my own, so keep my heart from believing the lies that I can live my life as I wish or thinking that I have all I need within myself to be what I was created to be, and to do what I was designed to do, apart from you and your empowering spirit. 

STRIVING TO ENTER INTO THE REST 

Senatobia = “rest for the weary”. In Egyptian mythology, Ptah is the demiurge of Memphis, god of craftsmen and architects.  Memphis was believed to be under the protection of the god Ptah, the patron of craftsmen.  Its great temple, Hut-ka-Ptah (meaning “Enclosure of the ka of Ptah”), was one of the most prominent structures in the city. The name of this temple, rendered in Greek as Aί-γυ-πτoς (Ai-gy-ptos) by the historian Manetho, is believed to be the etymological origin of the modern English name Egypt.  The Pharoah called Joseph Zaphnath-paaneah which means “treasury of the glorious rest”.

• (heb 6:11-12) 11And we desire each one of you to show the same earnestness to have the full assurance of hope until the end, 12so that you may not be sluggish, but imitators of those who through faith and patience inherit the promises.
• (heb 4) 1Therefore, while the promise of entering his rest still stands, let us fear lest any of you should seem to have failed to reach it. 2For good news came to us just as to them, but the message they heard did not benefit them, because they were not united by faith with those who listened.^a 3For we who have believed enter that rest, as he has said,  “As I swore in my wrath,  ‘They shall not enter my rest,’”  although his works were finished from the foundation of the world.4For he has somewhere spoken of the seventh day in this way: “And God rested on the seventh day from all his works.” 5And again in this passage he said,  “They shall not enter my rest.” 6Since therefore it remains for some to enter it, and those who formerly received the good news failed to enter because of disobedience, 7again he appoints a certain day, “Today,” saying through David so long afterward, in the words already quoted, “Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts.” 8For if Joshua had given them rest, God^b would not have spoken of another day later on. 9So then, there remains a Sabbath rest for the people of God, 10for whoever has entered God’s rest has also rested from his works as God did from his.11Let us therefore strive to enter that rest, so that no one may fall by the same sort of disobedience. 12For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. 13And no creature is hidden from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account.   (Hebrews 4)
• (matt 11) ²⁸ “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰ For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

In the OT the Israelites were promised a physical land but we have been promised ultimate rest.  Just as the Rainbow was the sign of the Covenant with Noah, and Circumcision the sign of the Abrahamic Covenant, The Sabbath was the sign of the Mosaic Covenant.  The Sabbath and promised land pointed to the ultimate rest that we enter into that comes from resting in Christ’s finished work of salvation, so we no longer having to carry the crushing burden of self-salvation through effort and performance.  I have been freed from the endless quest for life that consumes so many people because I have been invited into the rest of my savior.  I no longer have to chase after empty things that can never deliver and only leave me exhausted and restless.  Only in you can my heart be satisfied.  This world is a wilderness of want, but I have all I need in you.  I can now rest in my identity as your child knowing that my eternal future is secure.  I can now rest in your eternal love and powerful grace.  I can now rest in your constant presence and faithful provision.   Now the work that I do is to serve others out of the joy and gratitude for the ultimate work that was done on my behalf and the rest of heart that I have been given.

• 38Now as they went on their way, Jesus^d entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. 39And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching. 40But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” 41But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, 42but one thing is necessary.^e Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10)
  • Martha was distracted, anxious, and troubled by many things but Mary’s highest priority was at the feet of her teacher listening and learning from Jesus.  This was Mary’s number one priority which is the posture of a committed disciple.
  • Just as Ruth layed at the feet of Boaz, her Redeemer,
  • The greatest possession is close fellowship with you.  The greatest gift is to be in your presence.  You are my portion, my prize, my reward, my inheritance.

KEY OF DAVID 

You are concerned and look upon my heart, not upon my outward appearance or talent, so I ask for the Key of David, who was a man after your own heart, and I pray to be found Holy and True, sanctified and justified, with a pure heart who delights to do after your will, and I pray that your will would be done.   Remembering David’s supreme priority was to dwell in your house, so that He could gaze upon your beauty with a steady and sustained focus.  Praising, admiring, and enjoying you just for who you are, so that his heart could rest content. So may I do the same, with a single-minded focus of knowing you more intimately and becoming more like you.    For a day in your courts is better than a thousand.  I had rather be a door keeper in your house than dwell in the tents of the wicked. (ps 84)  

You alone are my portion, my prize, my reward, and my inheritance, so help me to be content in all my circumstances and in all things, wanting nothing but to be near you, to dwell in your presence, and in your house. Like a weened child may I be content just to be in your presence, enjoying your closeness and love without wanting anything else.  Tune my heart to sing your grace by the truth of your word and by the moving of the spirit in my heart.  Your presence lights my way, it’s your presence that give me hope that I will be delivered from evil, and it’s your presence that provides refuge for me when it seems there is nowhere else to run. 

PRAISE | GRATITUDE | THANKFULNESS

Help me to learn to give thanks in all circumstances; for this is your will in Christ  Jesus for me (1 Thess 5:18)  Keep me from focusing on what I don’t have and help me to keep my eyes fixed on you, and all the amazing blessings you have bestowed upon me.   I pray that I will continually take inventory of your faithfulness, praise you for your goodness, and remember all of your works.  Every good thing in my life is an undeserved blessing, so may my heart be filled with gratitude, contentment, and thankfulness, which celebrates your grace, rather than a grumbling, complaining, murmuring, and a self-entitled deserving heart which forgets your grace, ignores your presence, fails to see the beauty of your promises, and questions your goodness, faithfulness, and love for me.   Give me strength to look up and celebrate rather than looking around to compare and calculate. Help me to see all the ways you support and guide me every day, so that I will find new reasons to thank you. The more I see, savor, and express my gratitude to you, the more glory you receive as the grace-giver, and I get the joy of being a recipient of that grace.

A broken and contrite heart are the sacrifices you desire, so may my heart understand how much I have been given, when I did not deserve anything.  Help me to remember life is not about me, it’s about you. May your gospel put me in my place by reminding me of who you are and confront me with your beautiful and faithful mercy towards me.  Keep me from placing myself in the center and reducing my field of concern down to the small confines of my wants, feelings, needs, comfort, pleasure, and ease which leads to entitlement, disappointment, grumbling, and complaining.  (What is sitting on the other side of my “if-only”?).  May you always maintain your rightful place in my heart.  Remind my heart that everything in my life is an undeserved blessing and an act of your grace which will shift my complaint to need and thankfulness. 

Thank you for your routine mercies.  For sustaining my life daily by keeping my heart pumping and giving me the breath in my lungs, for being endlessly patient with me, for shielding me from the consequences of foolish behavior, for the ways you have walked with me in trials, for all my unanswered prayers.  Thank you for my family, for how much they love me, for how they are always there for me and would do anything for me, and for their Godly infuence on my life.  Thank you for the Godly men you have put in my life, Pop, Punkie, Dad, and Pat, whom I can pattern their life of faith.  Thank you for my church home and for the ministry opportunities you have given me and for the relationships that I have made there.  Thank you for the opportunity to walk along side my 242 boys and for the opportunity to teach the 6th graders.  Thank for the roof over my head, for putting clothes on my back, and food on my table.  Thank you for my job and for the ability to steward the money you have given me to help others and share the gospel.  

CONTENTMENT | SATISFACTION

When you met the woman at the well, you told her that what she was looking for in male affection can only be found in you, so remind my heart that another person can never complete or make me whole, only you can, and I have all I need in you.  Only in you can I find the living water that my heart desperately needs and seeks.  Only in you can my heart find satisfaction.  You are my true spouse, my bridegroom, in which all other relationships pale in comparison, but I pray I will also remember that you have given earthly marriage to us a gift, so if there is someone you do have for me, I pray that I would be able to love her as you loved the church, through the help of your spirit, and that it would be a marriage that honors and glorifies you.  Being single however, allows me to serve and attend to you without distraction, and allows me to testify to others that my relationship with you is so sufficient, rich, and satisfying, that I can do without human marriage in this age.  Being single allows me to show a culture that is so obsessed with sexual and romantic fulfillment, that you are more than enough for me, and it also testifies to the age to come.   They are good gifts in context, but only you can give me what is necessary. 

• 1 Cor 7
  • 1Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.”
  • 7I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.
  • 8To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. 9But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. 
  • 17Only let each person lead the life^c that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him. This is my rule in all the churches.
  • 26I think that in view of the present^h distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. 27Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed womanⁱ marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. 29This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away.32I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.36If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed,^j if his^k passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. 37But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well. 38So then he who marries his betrothed does well, and he who refrains from marriage will do even better.39A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 40Yet in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God.

Hell and destruction are never full; so the eyes of man are never satisfied” (pr 27:20) It is a bottomless pit of lust, envy, and greed, so keep me from looking to creation to satisfy my heart, when only you the creator can.  Help my heart to be satisfied in you and you alone.  Whom do I have in heaven but you?  There is nothing on earth I desire besides you, my flesh and heart may fail, but you are the strength of my heart and my portion forever (ps 73:25-26).  You are of supreme delight, the greatest gain, the highest reward, fullest joy, and lasting pleasure. I was made for you.  My heart was designed to be controlled by worship of you.  My inner security is meant to come from rest in you.  My sense of well-being is intended to come from a reliance on your wisdom, power, and love.  You are the peace I am looking for, the satisfaction my heart seeks, the rest that I crave, the joy that I long for, and the comfort my heart desires.

The most content person in the room is not the one who has the most, but who is happiest with the least.  If I have Christ, I am the most blessed person in the word.  I give up all I am for all that you are. Godliness with contentment is great gain.  For we brought nothing into the world, and it is certain we carry nothing out, and having food and clothes let us be content.  But they that are rich fall into temptation and a snare and into many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition.  For the love of money is the root of all evil which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.  (But you o man of God) so give me strength flee these things and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, and meekness.  (1 tim 6:6-11).  This world is a wilderness of want but I have all that I need in you.

1 Timothy 6:11 (303 + 308)11 Flee (love of money and covetousness).  Be content and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, and meekness. (6/12)12 Fight the good fight of faith, lay ahold to eternal life.  (Godliness with contentment is great gain)

(A Psalm of David. PS 23)  1You LORD are my shepherd, so I shall not want. 2You make me to lie down in green pastures.  You lead me beside still waters. ^a 3You restore my soul.  You lead me in paths of righteousness for your name’s sake. 4Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. 5You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. 6Surely^d goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

Ephesians 6:11 (303 + 308)11Put on the full armor of God, so that you can make your stand against the devil’s schemes. 

Help me to be sober-minded, vigilant, and watchful, remembering my adversary the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.  Help me to fight against his temptations, accusations, and lies.   Equip me with your belt of truth and let your word dwell richly within me so that my heart is instinctively shaped by your truth.  Help me to quench the flaming arrows of the evil one.  Give me strength to resist him and stand firm in the faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by other brothers throughout the world.  After I have suffered a little while, you, the God of grace who has called me to your eternal glory in Christ will restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish me. (1 Pet 5:8-10)  This side of eternity, while in between the already and not yet, we live in a war zone, and there is a war that rages for rulership of my heart each and every day.  It’s a war of doubt and faith, submission and rebellion, anxiety and trust, wisdom and foolishness, hope and despair, allegiance and disloyalty.  Before I was at enmity and war with you, now I am at war with my old sinful nature.  Give me strength to fight the good fight.  There is temptation at every corner and there is an enemy out there seeking to destroy me.  I lack the power to fight those spiritual battles by myself, but you have not left us alone, you are with us, and you can still a hurricane with a word, you are our champion fighting for us on our behalf and have already defeated our ultimate enemies, sin and death, by going to the cross.    I have overcome the evil one and the world, they can’t touch me.  Sin, Satan, nor the world has dominion over me, but its power and influence can come at me at the point of the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life.  So keep me from loving this world or the things in it and may I put on and apply each piece of your armor through prayer, for a helmet the hope of salvation, the breastplate of faith, love, & righteousness, the shield of faith, the sword of the spirit, my loins girded with truth, and my feet shod with gospel of peace, (Eph 6) which will allow me to face the harsh realities of life in this fallen and broken world with courage and hope, knowing that you are with us, and that you fight for us.   I pray I will fight the good fight of faith, and that I will finish the race and course you have set before me.  Forgetting what lies behind, not being paralyzed by my past, straining forward to what lies ahead, and pressing toward the goal for the prize of your upward call.  (phil 3:14) Strengthen and uphold me so I can persevere and endure.  Remembering you ran your course with joy, and it cost you your life, all because your heart’s desire was that we should be your people, so I pray I will learn to observe and do all that you have commanded and ordered as a good soldier, and that I would cast down every thought and imagination that exalts itself, bringing it captive into obedience to you. (2 cor 10:5)   Keeping your commands without spot, unrebukable until the appearing of our Lord Jesus Christ (1 tim 6:14).   I pray for purity of desire, the wisdom to recognize deception, and strength to fight battles I can’t avoid. No man that wars entangles himself with the affairs of this life, so that he may please him who has chosen him to be a soldier.  (2 tim 2:4) You get your best soldiers out of the highlands of affliction.  I pray for a single-minded desire to please you by obeying your rules and commands, working hard encouraged by your promises.   

Help me to remember who I am and what it means to be your child, so that it will keep my heart from envying the lives of others and from comparing myself with others, because the power of envy made the garden of Eden feel like it was not enough, and it robs me of joy and contentment, and it questions your goodness.    Envy forgets who I am, who you are, and confuses what life is all about.  Forgetfulness leads to comparing, calculating, and complaining instead of praising you for who you are and resting in what you have done.  When envy rules my heart, your love does not.  It is self-focused, self-righteous, expectant, impatient, shortsighted, and demanding.  It tells me I am entitled when I really don’t deserve anything.  It causes me to examine life from the sole perspective of my wants, needs, and feelings.  It accuses you of not knowing what you are doing or of being faithful to what you have promised to do.  Envy causes me to focus more on what I want than it does on the life that you have called me to.  It keeps me from paying attention to your commands and warnings.  So keep me from keeping score so I will not judge your goodness. Where envy and selfish ambition is, there is confusion (Babylon) in every evil work, but the wisdom that is from above is first pure, peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without impartiality, and without hypocrisy.  And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace (james 3:16-18)  

PATIENTLY WAITING W/ EXPECTANT HOPE IN HIS PROMISES

 You inhabit eternity and you see all of history in one single moment, so keep me from getting frustrated at your timing.  Your mills grind slow, but they grind exceedingly fine. They take time, but your promises will come true.  In my patience, I possess my soul, so help me to be patient as I wait with expectant hope in your promises, while in between the already and not yet messy middle of your grand redemptive story.  Remind me that you have not come into my life to meet my expectations but rather to meet my deepest and most desperate needs, so help me to trust in you promises rather than my perceptions.

We all have places in our lives like this barren stump.  Places where we don’t confidently believe anymore.  I don’t think that desire of my heart will ever be fully satisfied.  But in the gospel, and in God’s economy, nothing is ever truly dead.  Nothing is actually beyond hope.  Jesus is the shoot coming up from the dead stump and if he overcame death and promises to make all things new and set all things right so there is no part of my life that is not beyond hope.  These 60-80 years we have on this earth is not the most important part.  Put my hope in the shoot that is coming from the dead stump.  There will be life and fullness and fruit ahead.

Romans 15: 12And once more, Isaiah says: “The Root of Jesse will appear, One who will arise to rule over the Gentiles; in Him the Gentiles will put their hope.” 13Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you believe in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Your unfailing immutable promises and life-giving presence allow me to face the harsh realities of life in this broken world with courage and hope, which is a confident expectation of a guaranteed result that changes the way I live.  It does not rest on my own understanding, but on your goodness and rule.  You did not promise me success, a wife, or kids, or my definition of the good life…but you have promised those who love you and call upon your name, that you will rescue and protect us, that you will hear our prayers, that you will be with us in trouble, that you will give us rest, that you you will satisfy our restless hearts, and give us peace, and that you will give us honor, salvation, and eternal life.    

ETERNAL MINDSET

If our hope in Christ is for this life alone, we are to be pitied more than all men. (1 cor 15:19) This life is short, fleeting, fading, and temporary and marked with toil, trouble, and difficulty, so help me to keep and maintain an eternal mindset and perspective, remembering that I am not promised tomorrow.   The flesh is like grass which withers and the flower fades but your word shall stand forever (is 40)  Remind me of the brevity of life and teach me to number my days, so that I may apply my heart to wisdom, (ps 90:12). Help me to remember how short my time is! (Ps 89:47)  Give me proper perspective so that your steadfast love will be the one enduring satisfaction that I will seek,  so that I may rejoice and be glad all of my days. (ps 90:14)  Make me to know my end and measure of my days that I may know how frail I am.  You have made my days as a handbreadth and my age is nothing before you: every man at his best state is altogether vanity and walks in a vain shew, but I wait for and hope in you.  (ps 39)  Allow me to rest in what you have revealed about your plans for me, instead of worrying about what I have no power or control over.  Keep me from getting frustrated at your timing, a 1000 years in your sight are like a day, (ps 90:4), and keep me from wasting my time on trivial and meaningless things.  Help me to make best use of my time, because the days are evil (eph 5:16). Storing up for myself treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where my treasure is, there my heart will be also (Matt 6:20).  Keep my heart from pursuing and chasing after empty things that can never deliver, that have no capacity to satisfy my heart, and only leave me exhausted and restless.  Losing sight of eternity causes me to lose sight of what is important and causes my heart to seek satisfaction in temporary things, and causes me to load up my hopes, dreams, and aspirations in this life.  I carried nothing into this world, and I will leave with nothing.  I don’t enter through the Narrow Gate with any of my stuff, only your cross, so let the things of the earth grow strangely dim, in the light of your glory and grace.  Keep my heart from loving this world or the things in it.  Remembering the lusts and pride of this life are not from you, but of the world, and it is passing away, but whoever does your will, will last forever. (1 jhn 2:16) You have caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of your son from the dead to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, unfading, kept in heaven for us.  (1 pet 3:4) so let that clarify my values and renew my hope.  In the midst of this fallen world that is ever changing, subjected to futility, filled with trouble and uncertainty, in the pains of childbirth groaning to be delivered, with darkness all around us and everything being in the process of decay, my hope is not found in men trying to make it a better place, my hope is found in your son, whose power and love don’t shift with the times, and who has overcome the world and has made my future secure, giving me rest and peace.  I don’t have to deny reality in order to have peace in my heart. 

I am an alien, sojourner, and exile in this life, and this is not my home, it is only my journey to my eternal home with you.  This life is not meant to be the destination, but rather preparation for our final destination with you.    In light of eternity, it makes no sense to forget You and live for myself.  In the face of eternity, it is irrational to write my own rules and demand my own way.  Keep my heart focused on the paradise that is to come, so that I will stop asking this fallen world to be the paradise it will never be.  Walking with you is not a grand vacation free from responsibilities and trials, because our life with you right now is not the destination, but rather a time of preparation for the destination that will be our eternal home.  We have no continuing city, but we seek one to come.  (heb 13:14).  16So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self^d is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. 17For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, 18as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. (2 Cor 4:17-18).   

Though the earth passes away I have an eternal inheritance in you that can never be taken away, with a new heaven and a new earth.  So, help me to be patient as I wait with expectant hope in your promises, remembering that when you return all things will be restored, and we will be able to live in your presence free from the effects of sin forever with new glorified bodies.  Help me to focus on my spiritual privileges, inheritance, and rights which lay in the next life where you have gone and prepared a place for us and where there are many mansions. (john 14)    Help me to view life through the window of the resurrection, knowing this world is marching toward its final conclusion, our end is guaranteed, as well as the grace we need along the way.  Your truth will reign, your plan will be accomplished.  Sin will be defeated, and righteousness will reign.   You will ultimately fix all that sin has broken. You will wipe away our tears from our eyes, there shall be no more death, sorrow, crying, or pain, and you will make all things new. (rev 21).  Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, neither has any man’s mind ever imagined the wonderful things that you have in store for those who love you. (1 cor 2:9)

 SANCTIFICATION | TRANSFORMATION |  REFINEMENT | PURIFICATION
GROWING IN MATURITY & HOLINESS

Knowing we live in between the 2 is the key to a restful and wise Christian life

SOTERIOLOGY | THE DOCTRINE OF SALVATION

WHO AM I BECOMING?

• Is my view of who you are growing? Am I gaining a more robust understanding of who you, what you are like, what you desire, and what you have done?
• Is my view of myself accurate?  Am I seeing myself more abased as I see you in your lofty position?  And am I seeing my position in Christ expanding?
• Is sin growing in its abhorrence to me?  
• Is my view of Jesus becoming exceedingly precious to me?
• Is my view of the cross growing?
• Am I viewing the Church?  Do I view it as increasingly amazing and the best place on earth?  Is my understanding of all the benefits of the local church going up?
• Is my love for your word increasing?
• Is my prayer life increasing and becoming more intimate with you?
• How do I disagree with nonbelievers?
• How do I disagree with believers?
• How do I view Authority?
• How am I viewing obedience to you?  Am I saying that you are Lord, but living as though I am lord.  Its not how much we know, it is how much we submit to and apply to our life.
• How do I view false teachers?
• How do I view Hell?  Is it becoming increasingly horrible?  If I do not mention hell in the gospel to someone, there is a fair question if you love them at all
• How do I view Heaven?  Do I desire to be there or are my earthly roots growing deeper?
• How is my view of the Holy Spirit?
• How do I view serving?
• How do I view evangelism?  Do I have a desire to increasingly overcome my fears and share the great good news that Jesus saves sinners?
• How do I view my tongue?  Am I aware of its power to tear down and build up?
• How do I view the world/culture?  Do I increasingly see them with a darkened mind, not illuminated by the spirit of God, and they are simply lost, not sources of annoyance, and the evangelism opportunities?

You are sculpting and chiseling away the rough edges to reveal what you have put inside me and to reveal more and more of character and nature.  You are working to make me what you declared me to be which is Justified.

Fellowship with you is the “pearl of great price”.  It is the one treasure that makes everything else pale in comparison.  Help me to see this and incline my heart to desire you. 

A pearl is a jewel that comes from suffering.  The oyster gets a grain of sand inside its shell which hurts it so the oyster begins to protect itself the irritant by coating it with a secretion, layer upon layer, until it becomes a smooth, brilliant, shining treasure- a pearl! 

• 44“The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and covered up. Then in his joy he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field. 45“Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant in search of fine pearls, 46who, on finding one pearl of great value, went and sold all that he had and bought it. (MATT 13)

303 + 308 = 611 Psalms Devotional: 6/11 “Though you have made me see troubles many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up.” (Ps 71:20 )  I like the psalmist will trust in your sovereign wisdom and love, even when you send bitter trouble into my life, because I know in the end everything that happens is for the ultimate purpose of restoring my life-by deepening the love, wisdom, and joy of my spiritual life and by eventually resurrecting our bodies in the new world, wiped clean of all death and darkness.

MINISTRY

• 35“Stay dressed for action^f and keep your lamps burning, 36and be like men who are waiting for their master to come home from the wedding feast, so that they may open the door to him at once when he comes and knocks. (Luke 12:35)
• ¹³ preparing your minds for action,^[ and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.¹⁴ As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, ¹⁵ but as he who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, ¹⁶ since it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.” (1 Peter 1)
• ³ Share in suffering as a good soldier of Christ Jesus.
  ⁴ No soldier gets entangled in civilian pursuits, since his aim is to please the one who enlisted him.
  ⁵ An athlete is not crowned unless he competes according to the rules.
  ⁶ It is the hard-working farmer who ought to have the first share of the crops. ⁷ Think over what I say, for the Lord will give you understanding in everything. (2 Tim 1)
•  4Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships, and calamities; 5in beatings, imprisonments, and riots; in labor, sleepless nights, and hunger; 6in purity, knowledge, patience, and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; 7in truthful speech and in the power of God; with the weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; 8through glory and dishonor, slander and praise; viewed as imposters, yet genuine; 9as unknown, yet well-known; dying, and yet we live on; punished, yet not killed; 10sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything. Open wide my heart (2 Cor 6:3-10).

Keep me from thinking that ministry is something separate from my daily life.  I have been bought with a price so I pray that I will forsake “my life” mentality and daily live with a moment-by-moment ministry mentality, realizing every dimension of my life is a forum for ministry.   Prepare my mind for action.  I pray that I will be steadfast, unmovable, and always abounding in your work, knowing that my labor is not in vain. (1 cor 15:58).  I pray that I will do my best to present myself to you as approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth. I pray that I will cleanse myself from what is dishonorable so that I will be a vessel of honor, set apart as holy, and useful to the master of the house, prepared unto every good work, fleeing youthful lusts, and following after righteousness, faith, charity, and peace with those that call on you out a pure heart.  Knowing that as your servant I must not strive, but be gentle to all men, apt to teach, patient, in meekness, instructing those that oppose themselves (2 tim 2)

• May a be like a soldier and not a passive civilian.  May my I make it my aim to please you who enlisted me, and not get caught up in the affairs of this life, and may I be prepared to suffer the rigors and dangers of war. I have been drafted into ministry and you are transforming me to participate in the work of your kingdom.
  • Ephesians 6:11 (303 + 308)11Put on the full armor of God, so that you can make your stand against the devil’s schemes. 
• May I be like an athlete and not a passive spectator.  May I exercise self-control in all things and may I run like Paul to receive the prize, not aimlessly, but with a single minded focus and goal, to bring as many people as possible, from whatever station in life, to faith in the gospel (1 cor 9:26)  
• May I be like a farmer and not a passive customer.  May I expect to work hard for long hours, over long months, planting and sowing in all kinds of weather, to realize a harvest.
• May I live like I am in a lifeboat and not a yacht, who is more concerned with cares of comforts of this life.  May I live with mission to go after others who are still in the water with your gospel.  Those lost at sea, dying, and struggling to stay afloat, bringing them into the boat and pointing them to where true rest and hope can be found.

You are leading in places far beyond my strength and capabilities so that I become more reliant upon your strength.  So keep me from trying to do ministry in my own strength, and help me to remember my primary call is intimacy with you, and may my ministry be a byproduct from the overflow of that intimacy.  Remembering I minister not to assure myself of salvation, but so others may see you in my actions.   I commit my heart to the plans and purposes of your kingdom and seek the grace to be a part of what you are doing, not in the way of it.  I pray your agenda will be my agenda. 

SHARING THE GOSPEL | EVANGELISM

I pray that your gospel will be central to everything that I do, and that you will give me clarity and understanding, so that I will be able to share and communicate it clearly and effectively to others.  Only you have the power to save, but you have called us to witness, testify, proclaim, teach, live, and preach, so I ask that you equip and empower me to do so.  May my heart overflow with joy, so that I will want to share the source of my joy with everyone I meet.  There is not a person you will set in my path that is not fighting a great battle and experiencing the fallenness of this world, and I get the privilege of carrying the message of your salvation to those around me.  Where you have placed me is my mission field, so grow my understanding of your grace until it rids me of the self-consciousness, lethargy, and pessimism that keep me from opening my mouth and identifying as a Christian in public.  Forgive me for being silent about all you have done for me.  From the rising of the sun to its setting, may my lips praise your name, may I declare your worth above all, may I speak of your glory.  I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation.  I will sing your praise, for you have been good to me.  (ps 13).

I pray that I am always ready to give an answer for that hope that I have in you with meekness and fear.   Give me the ability to faithfully present your truth to others and I ask for the wisdom to say the right thing to bring the lost to the foot of the cross.  Help me lord, I am weak and don’t know what to say, but I do possess all 4 things that qualify me to be an effective witness, because I don’t have eloquent speech, I am weak, fearful, and trembling.  (1 cor 2) I ask for the power and authority to proclaim your kingdom and gospel to others and help me to remember that the only reason I believe, or anyone believes, is because of a miracle of your grace, so let me share and tell of your gospel with confidence and hope.  

DISCIPLESHIP| SERVANT LEADERSHIP 

I ask for the strength, courage, and wisdom to help lead and disciple the young men you have entrusted me with, and that I will be able to help them grow and mature in their faith and in the knowledge and understanding of who you are, so their relationship with you would deepen and so that they can follow you more fully.  I ask for the ability to help them to understand your gospel, that I will be able help them see who you are more clearly, and that the truths of your word would uproot the lies that they get fed with each day, and so their hearts and imaginations would be captured by the beauty of who you are and your gospel, and not the things of this world.   Help me with the questions they might have, so that I will be able to help them remove any obstacles that they might be facing that are hindering their relationship with you.  Give me strength to be able to help them through things they are struggling with and walking through.  Father it is my prayer that I can help them find wholehearted life in you.  I ask that your spirit move in and through the hearts of each one of them and that you would help them to feel your presence.  The way to experience future joy now is to live for another person’s progress and joy in the faith.   

Magnify your spirit within me so that I can bear fruit to you and help me to feel your presence.  (I must decrease, you must increase).   Your spirit is an intelligent spirit that works through truth, so give me the strength to reflect upon the truths of your word and help me to think out the implications of those truths and work them deep into my heart and mind until they uproot the lies that cause me so much fear, worry, and anxiety and so that my joy, peace, rest, and security that I have in you will increase, and so that it will drive out my paralyzing fear, and crippling anxiety of speaking and praying in front of others.   Remembering it’s your breath that gives us life and gives us the ability to pour out our praise to you, so with every breath that I am able, I pray that I will sing and speak of your goodness to others.    Open my mouth, so that I may speak of your praises and talk of your wonderful works.   I ask for spirit filled words that are truthful, honest, gentle, kind, wise, apt, direct, transparent, genuine, sincere, and few, and that they would be heard and understood, remembering that our tongue has the power of life and death, and that our words flow from our heart, so fill my heart with your spirit and with your son, so that it will heal my words.  I ask for the ability to walk humbly and speak boldly in your name and that I will speak the truth in love, remembering truth isn’t mean, and love isn’t dishonest, and knowing every word is an indication of what is in my heart.  Help me to not confuse spiritual gifts, biblical literacy, theological knowledge, ministry skill, and success, with spiritual fruit, personal maturity, and the evidence of a transformed life that pleases you.

• https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/o29qcdbr8yg4z1u7bypko/FSM-2023-Recap.mov?rlkey=pohde88ouxnxfy6mrz9b387f7&e=1&dl=0&save_as=true&save_as_action=MP4

SALT AND LIGHT | IMAGE BEARERS

You have called us to be salt and light, in the midst of the darkness and decay all around us.  You set me apart from the world in order to be used by you in it, so I ask that you will give me the ability to engage others with purposeful distinctiveness, without being influenced by the culture around me.  Remembering you have blessed me, so that I may bless others.  You have drawn me in, in order to send me out, and to serve and minister to others.  You have called me not to just be a recipient, but an instrument of your grace.

AMBASSADORS | RE-PRESENT THE KING TO OTHERS

I pray that I will be an effective witness to your kingdom, that others would see the work you have started in me, and that I would continue to reflect more of who you are to others, and that I would be a light to this dark world.  Being an ambassador re-presenting who you are as king, in word, deed, and character, extending the same grace, mercy, and compassion you have given me, to others.  Making your invisible presence visible, being a physical representation of your grace to others, by being the look on your face, the tone of your voice, and the touch of your hands. Loving others as you loved us, self sacrificially and steadfast.  Help me to make your mercy and faithfulness visible and concrete. Remembering that how I live my life is a testimony to others, because they are watching how I conduct myself, and how I respond to things as your child.   I pray they would see in me a radically transformed heart that is yielded to your spirit, and that my life will draw people to you, and that you will be magnified in my life for your glory.  As your image bearers, we were made to be seen and that you do see us, even when it seems like no one else does.

THE BODY OF CHRIST
COMMUNITY | RELATIONSHIPS | STONES OF TEMPLE
ECCLESIOLOGY

Remind my heart that our life with you is not to be done in isolation, but to be done in community with others, so continue to draw me closer to your people, and infuse my life with people of your own heart.  I ask for healthy relationships and that you would draw me in your love to those around me.  May I always be reminded that I am not alone in my journey.  You dwell in our hearts by faith, and we are rooted and grounded in your love, so that we may be able to comprehend what is the breadth, length, depth, and height.  Together we work and labor to edify each other, which is “the act of building up” and promoting growth, by serving others and not ourselves.  Each stone is bound together (bundled/united) through the Holy Spirit, and we endeavor to keep the unity in the bond of peace, by walking with all lowliness, meekness, long suffering, forbearing one another in love. (eph 3).  Help me to walk in a matter worthy of the calling to which you have called me, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the spirit in the bond of peace (eph 4)  Help me to become more serving rather than demanding, forgiving rather than accusing, approachable rather than defensive, and patient rather than critical in my relationships.  No one gives grace better than a person who is deeply convinced of his own need for it and aware of the grace he has been given.  Let my manner of life be worthy of your gospel of Christ so that we stand firm in one spirit, with one mind, striving sided by sided for the faith of the gospel. (phil 2)

STEWARDSHIP

(Matt 25 The Parable of the Talents) 14“For it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants^c and entrusted to them his property. 15To one he gave five talents,^d to another two, to another one, to each according to his ability. Then he went away. 16He who had received the five talents went at once and traded with them, and he made five talents more. 17So also he who had the two talents made two talents more. 18But he who had received the one talent went and dug in the ground and hid his master’s money. 19Now after a long time the master of those servants came and settled accounts with them. 20And he who had received the five talents came forward, bringing five talents more, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me five talents; here, I have made five talents more.’ 21His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant.^e You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ 22And he also who had the two talents came forward, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me two talents; here, I have made two talents more.’ 23His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ 24He also who had received the one talent came forward, saying, ‘Master, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you did not sow, and gathering where you scattered no seed, 25so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. Here, you have what is yours.’ 26But his master answered him, ‘You wicked and slothful servant! You knew that I reap where I have not sown and gather where I scattered no seed? 27Then you ought to have invested my money with the bankers, and at my coming I should have received what was my own with interest. 28So take the talent from him and give it to him who has the ten talents. 29For to everyone who has will more be given, and he will have an abundance. But from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away. 30And cast the worthless servant into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’

10As good stewards of the manifold grace of God, each of you should use whatever gift he has received to serve one another. 11If anyone speaks, he should speak as one conveying the words of God. If anyone serves, he should serve with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom be the glory and the power forever and ever. Amen. (1 pet 4)

Nothing I have belongs to me, they belong to you for your purposes, so I pray that I would be a faithful steward of the gifts, money, time, and resources that you have entrusted me with, so that I can make an eternal difference in the lives of others, and so I can enter into the joy of my master and here you say well done, good and faithful servant.  You own everything, you have gladly given me all I have, and your resources are unlimited, so my giving is not a deduction from a limited amount, but rather a distribution from a limitless supply.  Scattering gathers and gathering scatters.  You love a cheerful giver, and it is more blessed to give than receive.  Keep me from a complacent comfortable life, while being indifferent to those in need.    True wealth and riches can only be found in you, and true wealth is found by giving mine away.  Only in you, Father, can I take refuge and my heart find true security, freedom, and rest, because you are gentle and lowly, your yoke is easy, and your burden is light.   Where my treasure is, there my heart will be, and whatever has captured my heart, my treasure is going to flow to it effortlessly.  Any other treasure I set my heart upon will make me sacrifice, but you are the only treasure that sacrificed for me, and your riches are unsearchable.  Jesus is my treasure and my true wealth.  You emptied yourself and became poor for me, so that I, being poor and spiritually bankrupt, could have eternal riches in you.  The greatest treasure you can give us is your presence, and although I welcome the gifts of your hands, seeking your face is where I find the glory that other things fail to provide.  You alone are the fountain of life and love that I have looked for in other places, only to my misery, so unite my heart to fear your name because there is no want to those that fear you.  

THEOLOGY PROPER/PATEROLOGY
WHO GOD IS, HIS NATURE, CHARACTER, & ATTRIBUTES
(what comes to mind when we think about God is the most important thing about us,
nothing twists & deforms the soul more than a low or unworthy conception of God, tozer)

You give life to all things.  You give us the breath in our lungs.  You are a God of light and there is no darkness in you, and you are the only source of life, and the only source of truth.  You are the Lord our God, the God of Gods, and Lord of Lords, the great, the mighty and the awesome God, who is not partial and takes no bribe.  You execute justice for the fatherless and the widow, and you love the sojourner, giving him food and clothing. (Deut 10:17-18)  You know what is in the darkness and the light dwells with you (Dan 2:22).  You alone are God and there is none like you, and there is nothing to compare you to, or image to resemble you (is 40:18).  You are everlasting , the Creator of the ends of the earth, You are never surprised or afraid.  You never grow tired or weary, and there is no searching your understanding (is 40:28).     Righteousness and justice are the foundation of your throne; mercy, truth, love, and faithfulness go before you.  (ps 89:14) You are righteous in all your ways, which means you are completely fair and never exploit or abuse, and you are faithful in all that you do. You are the father of mercies and the God all comfort (2 cor 1:3).  You deliver, rescue, sustain, and restore.  You are a shelter for the homeless and father to the orphan.  You are near to the broken hearted and to all those that call upon you in truth. (ps 34:18) You avenge those who have been oppressed and who are weak and marginalized.    You are the source of all true compassion and the Father of comfort.  You are the tender High Priest who is touched by our feeling of weakness and offer us just the mercy we need in our time of need.  You are an ever-faithful friend and the Father who invites us onto his lap to be comforted by his love.

COMMUNICABLE ATTRIBUTES –  ( That we can catch)- You are compassionate, slow to anger, abounding in love, mercy, and forgiveness.  (ps 103:8).  You are patient, loving, kind, gentle and lowly, full of goodness, faithful, and meek.  (Gal 5)

NON-COMMUNICABLE ATTRIBUTES

• COSMOLIGICAL ARGUMENT – You are self-existent, timeless, eternal, non-spatial, and immaterial because you created time, space, and matter, so you are outside of those things, which means you are without limits and infinite.  You are unimaginably powerful (omnipotent), since you created the entire universe out of nothing.  You are also a personal and living God that can be known, since you chose to convert a state of nothingness into the time-space-material universe.  You are not just some remote force which has no ability to make choices.  You are ever present, everlasting, self-sufficient, heavenly, divine, transcendent, perfect, unchanging,  and incomprehensible.
• TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT – You are supremely intelligent, since you designed life and the universe with such incredible complexity and precision.  You are purposeful since you designed the many forms of life to live in this specific and ordered environment.  You are perfect in knowledge and wisdom, You are all knowing (omniscient).
• MORAL ARGUMENT – You are completely just, righteous, holy,  and spotless in purity.  You are the unchangeable standard of morality by which all actions are measured.  This standard includes infinite justice and infinite love.

TRANSCENDANT SOVEREIGNTY – You are the uncreated creator, who created all things, in heaven and on earth.   You are the uncaused first cause.  You created all the complexity of life from nothing.  You hold the world together by your will, and in your hands.  You have power and authority over all things, both physical and spiritual.  You made the earth by your power and established the world by your wisdom (jer 10).   You measured the waters in the hollow of your hand and marked off the heavens with a span, enclosed the dust of the earth in a measure and weighed the mountains in scales and the hills in a balance (is 40:12) You know the stars by name, and you hold the waters of the universe in the palm of your hand.  When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them?  (ps 8) By faith we understand that the worlds were framed by your word, so that the things which are seen, were not made of things which do appear (heb 11:3).  Your will is always done, your plan always succeeds, and everything in creation does your bidding.   Events happen according to your plan and everything in history is ultimately used to fulfill your purposes.  When the kings and rulers of this world came against your anointed, they only did what you predetermined them to do, because you alone are sovereign.  You alone reign, and you rule your creation for your purposes and your plans.   Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, and your dominion endures throughout all generations (ps 145:13).   

And yet in spite of all this, my praise falls so short of this reality.  Accept my prayer through the mercies of you son.

All flesh is like grass before you, but your word shall stand forever (is 40:6). Your word is eternal; it stands firm in the heavens.  Your faithfulness continues through all generations, you established the earth and it endures.   Your laws endure to this day, for all things serve you.  (ps 119:89-91) 

IMMANENT SOVEREIGNTY – Your rule is individual and detailed.  You are reachable, touchable, and near.  Everything we do is part of your plan, yet we are never coerced and we are completely responsible for our actions which keeps me from being stressed by believing its all up to us how our lives go, and also from thinking that our choices don’t matter.  You are sovereign and I am responsible. 

All things work together for our good and for your glory, for those who love you, and who have been called according to your plans and purposes.  (rom 8:28) Although I have no control over my life, I find rest and comfort in you who does, the one who is never confused or dismayed.  So many of my circumstances don’t make sense to me, but they make sense to you. You are over all the trouble that confounds me and you rule every moment of every situation. My times are in your hands (ps 31:15).  Help me, like David, to rest in that. You take disasters in our life and make them tools of your redemption.  You take our failures and employ them as tools of your grace.  You use death in this fallen world to motivate us to reach out for life.  You let pieces of creation die in our hands, so that we are increasingly freed from asking the earth to give us what only you can give.    You forgive my past and hold my future in your hands.  You harnessed the forces of nature and controlled the events of history to deliver us.  

You made us in your image and likeness, and in you, we live and move and have our being, we are your offspring (acts 17:28), and you have given us the world you created to care for, as your agents.  You made us rulers over the works of your hands and put everything under our feet, so justice towards everyone stamped with your image, brings glory to you but we failed miserably at this, but on the cross your son experienced the cruelest and most unjust thing that has ever happened, and yet at the same time it became the best thing that has ever happened, and you planned it all.  Now you have put all things underneath his feet.  He will conquer and subdue everything including the last enemy which is death, when you put down all rule, and all authority, and all power. (1cor 15:24-27) Behind everything you do is something unimaginably greater. 

You are over both our losses and our hallelujahs, so may my heart trust you in the difficult times, as well as celebrate the gifts you provide.   I pray I will serve you with fear and celebrate your rule with trembling (ps 2:11).  

NAMES, IMAGES, METAPHORICAL ROLES – You are the Lord Almighty, all-powerful to save and rescue.  The Lord my Banner, who is victorious over enemies.  The Lord my Shepherd, who keeps, provides, and nurtures.  The Lord my Healer, who restores what is broken and redeems what is lost.  The Lord my Righteousness, who is true, right, and holy.  The Lord Everlasting, who is forever and always God, who sees and knows me.  The Lord my Peace, who makes things as they were meant to be.  The Lord of Hosts, who is over all heavenly beings.  You are my Father who adopted me and my Provider who gives me with everything I need. 

You combine characteristics which seem to be opposed to one another.   You are the king, yet also a servant, a lion yet also a lamb, powerful and majestic yet humble and weak, wielder of the sword and yet also the victim, the storm yet where we find rest, sovereign yet submissive, highly exalted yet closest to the poor and lowly, strong yet weak and tender, fierce yet harmless, the wisest yet simple, champion leader yet gentle and lowly.   Your words confront yet also comfort.      

You are God of tender sacrificial love, compassion, goodness, with bottomless stores of mercy, full of grace, yet you are also absolute righteous unbound power and strength, uncompromisingly just, holy, and a God of wrath, vengeance, and severity, having unbending demands for righteousness.   Therefore, you come against, hate, judge, and are in rightful settled opposition to everything that is evil, wicked, sinful, and contrary to your design and holy nature.  You get angry, not in spite of your love, but because of it.  The more closely and deeply you love us, the angrier you get when you see us harmed or abused.  The greater the harm, the more resolute your opposition will be, so your senses of love and justice are activated together, not opposed to each other.  Your wrath flows from your love and delight in your creation, so your anger comes from a response to the evil and injustice that destroys what you have created, and you will make a full end to it.  Because if you are good and just, then you must by your nature, punish murderers, rapists, thieves, liars, adulterers, sexually immoral, and those who have lived in rebellion to the inner light you have given us.  Transgressing your boundaries and lawlessness cannot go on forever.  (ie being self-sufficient, self-absorbed, violence, greed, lust, injustice, self-glorification, disobedience, gossip, slander, pride, murder, envy, idolatry)

Since you are just and justice demands punishment for the crime, you can’t just forgive us.  You cannot overlook evil, and it can’t be dealt with, removed, or healed by just saying “forget it”.  It must be paid for and dealt with, which requires a steep price.  Sin always entails a penalty. You pay us in death for our sins and your judgement against sin is always righteous.  It is the debt that all men must pay.  We have all earned the death sentence.  Guilt cannot be dealt with unless someone pays.   Your wrath against sin has to be satisfied.  The entire Old Testament bears witness to this because every time sin is atoned for in the tabernacle or temple, a substitute animal goes under the knife and dies.  

The sword that was placed outside of the garden represented that there was no way back into your presence unless someone goes under the sword of your divine justice.  It was a graphic representation of the truth that the penalty for sin is death and that the way back into your presence was blocked by justice.  There was a debt that had to be paid.

After you rescued Israel from Egypt and brought them to Mount Sinai, your raw, unmediated presence was unbearable and the way back to the garden was not open yet, so you created a moveable tabernacle sanctuary where people could draw near to you. The Tabernacle was your way of beginning to restore what had been lost with many features of the Garden of Eden appearing in the design of the Tabernacle and, later, the Temple. 

 They both faced east, and cherubim angels which represented signs of your immediate presence, guarded the entrance to the Garden and were carved into the entrance of the temple.    All parts of temple architecture-walls, pillars, furniture, and curtains-were filled with palm trees, lions, pomegranates, animals, and flowers, vividly calling to our mind your original garden.  The tabernacle was the initial re-establishment of your habitation on earth.

Your throne room in the sanctuary was the holy of holies which was one place in the world where your “name dwelled,” where your Shekinah glory-cloud resided, and it was the one place that heaven and earth touched.  But the Holy of Holies was separated from the rest of the tabernacle by a thick curtain or barrier on which cherubim were embroidered so no one could go in.  Only the high priest himself could go into the holy of holies once a year, and even then, he had to put incense on the fire to create enough smoke so that he would not see anything that would kill him.  In the holy of holies was the Ark of the Covenant, a wooden box, overlaid with gold, containing the tablets of the Ten Commandments, and served as your footstool.  Over the top of the Ark, between the 2 carved angels, was a slab of pure gold called the “mercy seat” where on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, the high priest offered a blood sacrifice for the sins of the people, and you alone spoke over the mercy seat.  

Providing us a with a clear image that the 10 Commandments demanded obedience and a holiness of which no human being was capable.  The only way to fellowship with you, and to have you speak to us, was for the atonement of sins to be made.  Just as the sword of justice guarded the way back into the Garden, so the high priest had to go “under the sword” with a blood sacrifice, symbolically atoning for sin, paying the penalty in order to go even briefly into your presence.  At the conclusion of the tabernacle service, you blessed the people with your shalom, or peace.  And yet the glory of your holiness remained behind the veil in the sanctuary where no sinner could enter.  The Tabernacle brought you nearer but still no one could see your glory and live. 

But on the cross, the veil of the temple was torn in 2, dismantling the old temple, and we now unite with the risen Christ by faith, through the holy spirit, which is the Shekinah glory of your presence that dwelt behind the veil, that used to kill things on contact, is now an explosive life giving force that floods into us.    

PNEUMATOLOGY 
DOCTRINE OF HOLY SPIRIT  

KNOWING THE SPIRIT – Your holy spirit is our (paraclete) helper, counselor, advocate, and comforter who comes alongside us to help.  The holy spirit is the very presence of your son Jesus living in us.  Your holy spirit is your indwelling presence within us.  You tabernacled among us to comfort us, to bring all things into remembrance, to teach us all things, to guide us in truth, and to point to the person and work of your son.   The Holy spirit is fully God and teaches and reminds us of the words of Jesus.  Your Holy Spirit takes the law and shows us our sin and shows us we don’t meet your righteous standard.  Your spirit shows us our sin so that we can turn from it and then points us to Christ who fulfilled the Law on our behalf.  The spirit tells others about Jesus through us.  The holy spirit in is us is better than Jesus incarnate with us.  The Holy spirit  is “the Spirit of Truth”.   Spirit is “breath of life”.  He fills our lives and points us to the one who is life.  He makes the truth of your word real to us in heart and experience.   The spirit glorifies Jesus.  The spirit points us to Jesus, our rescuer and our redeemer.  The Spirit’s work is to make Jesus known, helping us glorify God.  So if the spirit is in me, my new purpose is to glorify Christ.  The Holy Spirit is You (the triune God).  Your spirit hovered over the waters during creation, inspired your (God) breathed word, resurrected the dead, is responsible for regeneration and sanctification.

WHY I NEED THE SPIRIT – We can not do what you have called us to do without the gift of you Holy Spirit.  The life you have called us to is impossible apart from your spirit and without it, I can do nothing, so help me to recognize my inadequacies and become more dependent upon your spirit.  Help me to be aware of my need of your presence and power to enable me to reflect the words, attitude, and actions of Christ, and to think rightly, shape my desires, and equip and empower me to choose wisely. 

The moment we put our faith in Christ, the Spirit indwells us.  The baptism of the Spirit is the work of the Spirit by which we are identified with Christ and placed into the body of Christ, the universal church.  We are sealed as a pledge that we are His, we are secure, and He will bring us home to Himself.  It is the seal and promissory note/earnest money/down payment, that you paid the ultimate price for, that secures us as yours and that guarantees us of our future inheritance in your eternal kingdom, when you return to redeem your purchased possession and set all things right. (eph 1:14) 

DEPENDING ON THE SPIRIT – Although we are “indwelt” by the spirit, we are not always “filled” with spirit.   We are filled with spirit by faith.  Faith that is keenly aware and accepting of inadequacy and marked by a person who knows they are powerless and incapable of living the life You have called us to.  Biblical faith is always visible faith through choices and actions.   Faith by which we are filled with the Spirit, is fully dependent and visibly active.  The person who is filled with the spirit trusts the Spirit to do what they cannot do, as they do it, by faith.  (Wen you sense the Spirit inviting you to take a step of obedience, a step of faith (maybe to talk to someone about Christ) recognize that you cannot do so in your own power and depend on the spirit, trusting the Spirit to fill your mouth and then start talking).  Batteries in Flashlight.  The reason the flashlight did not work the way it was made to work was not because there were no batteries, or that the batteries were depleted, it was because they were put in the wrong way.  We often fail to experience the power of the spirit in our lives not because the spirit’s power is depleted but because we do not clearly understand the “indwelling” and the “filling” of the Spirit, so we short circuit His power in us.

(Matt: 25: The Parable of the Ten Virgins) 1“Then the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps^a and went to meet the bridegroom.^b 2Five of them were foolish, and five were wise. 3For when the foolish took their lamps, they took no oil with them, 4but the wise took flasks of oil with their lamps. 5As the bridegroom was delayed, they all became drowsy and slept. 6But at midnight there was a cry, ‘Here is the bridegroom! Come out to meet him.’ 7Then all those virgins rose and trimmed their lamps. 8And the foolish said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.’ 9But the wise answered, saying, ‘Since there will not be enough for us and for you, go rather to the dealers and buy for yourselves.’ 10And while they were going to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the marriage feast, and the door was shut. 11Afterward the other virgins came also, saying, ‘Lord, lord, open to us.’ 12But he answered, ‘Truly, I say to you, I do not know you.’13Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour.

Luke 12:3535“Stay dressed for action^f and keep your lamps burning, 36and be like men who are waiting for their master to come home from the wedding feast, so that they may open the door to him at once when he comes and knocks.

CO-LABORING | WORKING WITH THE SPIRIT – In order to be transformed we are completely dependent on the work of the spirit, but at the same time we are invited-and even commanded-to play a role in the process.   You direct and we respond and together we co-labor like gardeners in a garden of our hearts together.   We are to work out our salvation with fear and trembling, applying what we have already received into every nook and cranny of our lives.  Help me to think out the implications of what you have done for us how I ought to live in light of what You have done for us.   I pray that I will  draw near with a true heart and full assurance of faith, casting off the works of the flesh, darkness, and every weight and sin that so easily besets me, (heb 12:1) the lust, envy, covetousness, wickedness, greed, pride, selfishness, jealousy, anger, bitterness, and strife, and that I will put on Christ (rom 13:14), walking in the Spirit, following after, patience, love, joy, peace, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, meekness, gentleness, and self-control, against which there is no law, and so that I may bear the fruits of your spirit, glorifying you in all that I do, and showing evidence of my submission to your spirits work within me.  May I remember that I can’t bear fruit apart from you, so I pray that I will walk and abide in your love, truth, and spirit, so that the law of righteousness and truth be fulfilled in me, walking in your spirit and not after the flesh.  Fruitfulness is your primary creative and redemptive purpose

Spiritual disciplines are resources to help me grow my spiritual muscles to co-labor with the spirit to help me produce spiritual fruit.  The spirit stirs within us the desire to be transformed and take steps in these disciplines.  (praying, fasting, meditation, bible study, slowing down against the pull of productivity, obstaining from social media and screens (is this content stirring my affection for Jesus?)

CHRISTOLOGY
WHO CHRIST IS, HIS NATURE, CHARACTER, and ATTRIBUTES

He is your invisible image, the firstborn over all creation.  For in Him all things were created, all things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities. All things were created through Him and for Him. He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.  And He is the head of the body, the church; He is the beginning and firstborn from among the dead, so that in all things, He may have preeminence (superiority).  For you were pleased to have all your fullness dwell in Him, and through Him, to reconcile to yourself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through the blood of His cross. (Colossians 2:15-20).

You appointed him heir of all things, and through whom you created the world.  He is the radiance of your glory and the exact imprint of your nature, and he upholds the universe by the word of his power.  After making purification for sins, he sat down at the right hand of your Majesty on high, having become as much superior to angels as the name he has inherited is more excellent than theirs (Hebrews 1:2-4)

So keep me from doing anything out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility considering others better than myself, looking out for the interest of others, taking on the nature of a servant as you did.  5Let this mind be in me, which was also in Christ Jesus:  6Who, existing in the form of You, did not consider equality with You something to be grasped,a 7but emptied Himself, taking the form of a servant, being made in human likeness.8And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross. 9Therefore You exalted Him to the highest place and gave Him the name above all names, 10that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of you God, our Father. (Phil 2:5-11)

• He is the resurrection, the way, the truth, and the light.
• He is gentle and lowly, his yoke is easy, and his burden is light.  (Matt 11:29)
• He is your word made flesh and only when we are hidden in Christ, our rock, can we see your glory and be in your presence. 
• He is the true vine, you are the husbandman, and we are the branches, so only abiding in him can we bear fruit to you.   
• He is the living word, the life, and the light of men, the author, creator, and sustainer of life, your son full of grace and truth, your lamb who takes away the sins of the world, the author of eternal salvation.    
• He is the light (sun) of the world.   
• He is the water that nourishes us and the bread that feeds us.
• He is the rock upon which i stand.
• He is my fortress, my strong tower, my hiding place, and my shelter in the midst of the storms, in whom I can take refuge. 
• He is my king and lord who I bow down before and whose authority I submit to. 
• My owner and redeemer who purchased and delivered me with a steep price.  
• My judge who has declared me innocent, righteous, and blameless. 
• My advocate and representative in heaven who justifies me in your courts, which means we are completely forgiven, and our companion on earth, so we are intimately loved. 
• He is the door of the sheep and He is the Lamb that bore the penalty for our sin.
• My good shepherd who leads me beside still waters and makes me to lie down in green pastures, and in the straight paths of righteousness for your name’s sake.  Who seeks us when we have wandered and are lost, and brings us back to the fold of his care.
• My bridegroom and spouse who I have entered into a loving relationship with. 
• My high priest who has covered and atoned for my sin, and who sanctifies, cleanses, washes, and sets me apart to holiness; and who daily brings my case to you. 

We have a high priest who understands our condition.  He is sympathetic to my weaknesses because he hears and answers me from the vantage pint of an experiential basis of knowledge of exactly what I am going through.  He shared our humanity and he carries our travail in his heart.  He was born into the toughest conditions; was misunderstood, mistreated, and rejected throughout his life.   His closest friends forsook him when the going got tough.  He was betrayed by those he should have been able to trust.  He knew what it was like to be homeless, hungry, and rejected.  He felt the worst kind of injustice.  He endured torturous physical suffering.  His death was marked by public shame.  No one rose to his defense.  He suffered alone and you turned your back on him in his deepest moment of agony.  He did not use his power to make his life easy or to escape injustice and torture.  He faced all of this for us, in our place, so we could be reconciled back to you.   He knows us and has a firsthand understanding of what we deal with day in and day out.  Our High Priest understands what it is like to be a human being in this fallen world because he took on flesh and lived with us as a man.  Now, as the resurrected and ascended man, he sits next to You as our High Priest so our struggles and prayers are not greeted with harshness, condemnation, or impatience, but with understanding and sympathy.

• My counselor and friend who sympathizes and comforts me in my affliction and will not forsake us even in our worst moments.
• My master who teaches me all things.   
• My warrior and champion who fights for me and is always victorious. 
• He is the alpha and the omega, the beginning and the end, who was, and is, and is to come. The Almighty (rev 1:8). 
• He is the King of Kings and the Lord of lords, who alone has immortality, who dwells in inapproachable light, whom no one has ever seen or can see.  To Him be honor and eternal dominion.  (1 Tim 6:16)
• He is your answer to all the chaos and strife in this world.

He is the king of the Jews, the king of Israel, the king of righteousness, the king of the ages, the king of heaven, the king of glory, the king of kings, and the Lord of Lords.  He is a sovereign king, and no means of measure can define his limitless love.  He is enduringly strong, entirely sincere, eternally steadfast, immortally graceful, imperially powerful, impartially merciful.  He is the greatest phenomenon that has ever crossed the horizon of this world.  He is your son, he is a sinner’s savior, he is the centerpiece of civilization, he’s unparalleled and unprecedented.  He is the loftiest idea in literature, the highest personality in philosophy, the fundamental doctrine of true theology, the only one qualified to be an all-sufficient savior.  He supplies strength for the weak, he’s available for the tempted and the tried, he sympathizes, and he saves, he strengthens and sustains, he guards, and he guides, he heals the sick, cleansed the lepers, forgives sinners, discharges debtors, delivers the captive, defends the feeble, blesses the young, serves the unfortunate, regards the aged, rewards the diligent, and he beautifies the meek.  He is the key to knowledge, the wellspring of wisdom, the doorway of deliverance, the pathway of peace, the roadway of righteousness, the highway of holiness, the gateway of glory.  His life is matchless, his goodness is limitless, his mercy is everlasting, his love never changes, his word is enough, his grace is sufficient, his reign is righteous, and his yoke is easy, and his burden is light.  You can’t outlive him, and you can’t live without him.  The pharisees couldn’t stand him, but they found out they couldn’t stop him, Pilate couldn’t find any fault in him, Herod couldn’t kill him, death couldn’t handle him, and the grave couldn’t hold him!

There is power in his name and when we call upon the name of Jesus, chains break, demons flee, and healing is present.  It is the name above all names and the name given among heaven whereby we must be saved.  It is the name by which every knee will bow, and every tongue will confess.  (rom 14:11, phil 2:10-11)

ALL THINGS POINT TO HIM | HE IS THE SUBSTANCE THAT FULFILLED THE SHADOW | HE IS THE GREATER THAN – The Law and its regulations are types and shadows, with the primary purpose being to point out the shape of something beyond it and to point to your eminent arrival, which is the substance (body), which is Christ who fulfilled the shadow.

17“Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them.18For truly, I say to you, until heaven and earth pass away, not an iota, not a dot, will pass from the Law until all is accomplished. 19Therefore whoever relaxes one of the least of these commandments and teaches others to do the same will be called least in the kingdom of heaven, but whoever does them and teaches them will be called great in the kingdom of heaven. 20For I tell you, unless your righteousness exceeds that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. (Matt 5:17-20)

• He is the greater Sabbath rest.  The sabbath and promised land pointed to the ultimate rest that we enter into that comes from resting in Christ’s finished work of salvation, so we no longer having to carry the crushing burden of self-salvation through effort and performance.
• Jesus is the cherubim sword that guarded the entrance back into the garden. He is the tree of life in the garden.  He is the real and true High Priest and the sacrificial Passover lamb who underwent the sword of Justice for us, and the sacrifice to end all sacrifices.   

• He is the greater Ark that we take refuge in when you come to judge the earth.

• He is Jacob’s ladder, the only gate to heaven, the one who brings heaven to earth.  He is not just a bridge to your glory, He is your glory and the temple to end all temples. 

• He is the greater Passover Door, the door of Salvation, that offers freedom from slavery, bondage, and darkness caused by sin & death. 

• He provided a greater Exodus.  The Exodus and escape from Egypt into the Wilderness pointed to Christ parting the waters for us to escape the ultimate bondage from sin and death.  We now are in the wilderness until Christ returns and brings us into the ultimate promised land…eternal life.

• He is the greater Rock of Horeb, who receiving the rod of your justice, gives us the water of eternal life in a desert of a world.
•  He is the greater manna, the true bread from heaven that gives life unto the world and whoever believes on Him shall never hunger or thirst.

• He is the greater Serpent on the Pole that was lifted up in the wilderness because he was made to be sin who knew no sin and became a curse for us.  On the cross Jesus became the very thing that was destroying us.  He was treated as if he were sinful, and so he was cursed and put to death in our place.  And now it is only as we in faith look at him on the cross – as we look at him becoming the sin that was killing us and taking the death that should have been ours- that we can be forgiven and healed.  On the cross God turned the curse of death on sin into a blessing for us.  

• He is the true and greater prophet, high priest, and king.  

22This makes Jesus the guarantor of a better covenant. 23The former priests were many in number, because they were prevented by death from continuing in office, 24but he holds his priesthood permanently, because he continues forever. 25Consequently, he is able to save to the uttermost^b those who draw near to God through him, since he always lives to make intercession for them.  26For it was indeed fitting that we should have such a high priest, holy, innocent, unstained, separated from sinners, and exalted above the heavens. 27He has no need, like those high priests, to offer sacrifices daily, first for his own sins and then for those of the people, since he did this once for all when he offered up himself. 28For the law appoints men in their weakness as high priests, but the word of the oath, which came later than the law, appoints a Son who has been made perfect forever.

• He is the greater Tabernacle and Temple upon whom all the lines and themes of the temple converge- he is the sacrifice, the priest, the altar, the light, the bread, the blood of purification, the Shekinah glory.  

• We are now stones of the new temple and He dwells in our heart by faith. 

 (Ephesians 2) 14For he himself is our peace, who has made us both one and has broken down in his flesh the dividing wall of hostility 15by abolishing the law of commandments expressed in ordinances, that he might create in himself one new man in place of the two, so making peace, 16and might reconcile us both to God in one body through the cross, thereby killing the hostility. 17And he came and preached peace to you who were far off and peace to those who were near. 18For through him we both have access in one Spirit to the Father. 19So then you are no longer strangers and aliens,^d but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, 20built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the cornerstone, 21in whom the whole structure, being joined together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord. 22In him you also are being built together into a dwelling place for God by^e the Spirit. 

• He is the greater Adam, He is the true firstborn of all creation.  He is the true and better Adam who passed the test in the garden, a much tougher garden, and whose obedience is imputed to us.  You breathed into Adam the breath of life into his lungs, but on the cross Jesus died from suffocation, and then you breath your spirit into our lungs in the new birth.
• He is the greater Aaron who was the High Priest that atoned for the sins of Israel
• He is the true and better Abel, who, though innocently slain, has blood that cries out, not for our condemnation, but for our acquittal.
• He is the true and better Abraham, who answered the call of God to leave all the comfortable and familiar and go into the void, not knowing whither he went.
• He is the true and better Isaac, who was not just offered up by his father on the mount, but was truly sacrificed for us all. What you said to Abraham, “Now I know you love me because you did not withhold your son–your only son whom you love–from me.” Now we, at the foot of the cross, can say to you, “Now we know that you love me because you did not withhold your Son–your only Son whom you love–from me.”
• He is the true and better Jacob, who wrestled and took the blow of justice we deserve so we, like Jacob, only receive the wounds of grace that wake us up and discipline us.
• He is the true and better Joseph, who sits at the right hand of the King and forgives those who betrayed and sold him and uses his power to save them.  
• He is the true and better Moses who stands in the gap between the people in the Lord and who mediates a New Covenant. 
• He is the greater Joshua who led Israel into the Promised Land 
• He is the greater Boaz, the Kinsman Redeemer who purchased us with His own life from the bondage and slavery to sin, death, and darkness. 
• He is the true and better Job, who became a truly innocent suffer and now intercedes for and saves his stupid friends. (Is that a type? That’s not typology; it’s an instinct.)
• He is the true and better David, whose victory becomes his people’s victory, though they never lifted a stone to accomplish it themselves.  He defeated the giant of sin and death and is our eternal king.  He is our champion who fights for us.
• He is the true and better Esther, who didn’t just risk losing an earthly palace but lost the ultimate heavenly one, who didn’t just risk his life but gave his life, who didn’t just say, “If I perish, I perish,” he says, “When I perish, I’ll perish for them to save my people.”
• He is the true and better Jonah, who was cast out into the storm so we could be brought in.
• He is the greater Ephraim who was considered the first born of God.  Israel/Ephraim was considered your firstborn, but it wasn’t until the perfect son, Jesus, came and died as the son of God to annul the old covenant and to establish the new.  He died in our place.  He came as the true Son of God, Israel.  Israel/Ephraim was no longer son because of disobedience.  Jesus was son because of obedience.   When He died on the cross, the marriage covenant was made void because He died as the true son, Israel.  Joseph was Jesus earthly father and Jesus was his adopted son.   Ephraim’s father was Joseph who sat at the right hand of the king, and they were adopted in as one of the 12 tribes of Israel, just as Jesus sits at the right hand of the father and you predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ into your kingdom. 

The gospel is the resolution of every plotline and narrative, and the fulfillment of every concept and image in the bible.  The OT and NT are one, inspired by the same spirit and filled with the same subject, the promised Messiah.  The prophets foretold what the apostles reported.  Seers looked forward and evangelist look backward, but their eyes meet at one place and behold the cross.  The Bible’s plotline is resolved in Christ.   All the seemingly loose threads and contradictory claims of the rest of the bible come together in Jesus.  Jesus came and fulfilled the conditions of the Law, so you could love us unconditionally.   Mercy can do what the Law is powerless to do.     He fulfilled all the Clean and Sacrificial Laws, which were the blood atonement for their sins, which both proved that no matter how hard they tried, they could never make themselves clean, and that is why they needed the sacrifices. Only in Jesus Christ are we clean because Christ fulfilled the sacrifices and atoned for our sin, because He was the sacrifice to which all other sacrifices pointed to, which means if we believe in Him, we don’t have to do those sacrifices anymore.  He fulfilled all Civil, Dietary, and Ceremonial laws because only in Jesus Christ am I accepted so we are no longer held accountable to those laws (shellfish, sowing different seeds, mixing garments, etc).  We are only still held accountable to the Moral Law.

HAMARTIOLOGY
FALLEN NATURE OF MAN -THE NATURE OF SIN 

Your grace and mercy cannot be understood, until our corrupt nature and our guilt is exposed, by seeing how miserably we have failed at meeting the righteous standard and impossible demands of your Law.    Grace means nothing to a person who does not know he is sinful, and that his sin separates him from you, and that he is eternally damned.  A sinner will never accept your grace until they tremble before your just and holy law, which reflects your perfect holiness.     

Sin is transgression of your Law, and it separates us from you, because it cannot exist in your presence.   It is only against you, our creator who gave us life.  Sin makes me quest for independence and self-sufficiency but your creation depicts ownership and dependency, which means I don’t have the right to live how I choose. 

Sin is first and foremost a matter of the heart, not our behavior.  Sin at its core is rooted in selfishness and pride and it puts me as the hero of my own story with no one to thank but me.  Sin places me at the center and makes life all about my wants, needs, feelings, and happiness.  Sin is more than breaking a set of rules, it is the breaking of relationship that results in breaking your rules.  Only when you are in your rightful place in my heart that I desire, to live in a way that pleases you.  Otherwise I insert myself in your place, write my own laws and give myself to doing what pleases me.  Sin is like treason because it attempts to overthrow you, to whom I owe everything.  When I sin, I don’t just break your rules, I trample on your heart.  Sins steals your glory and denies your existence and authority and replaces you with something else.  Sin quests for your throne, power, and glory by challenging your rule, questioning your goodness, wisdom, faithfulness, and love.  Sin causes me to step over your wise boundaries in thought, word, deed, and actions.  Sin causes my heart to wander.  Sin makes me crave material things instead of spiritual provision.

Sin convinces me that I am ok when I am heading for a disaster.  Sin leads to inescapable wickedness, depravity, death, destruction, injustice, violence, crime, oppression, danger, war, and political corruption.  Sin is just like cancer that destroys and leads to death.   Sin loads on burdens, creates confusion, leaving me lame, weak, guilty, and unable to live in a way that pleases you.  Sin creates bad habits, distorts our affections, kidnaps our desires, distorts our thoughts, controls our tongue and behavior.  Sin controls us and we end up surrendering our heart to something that wants to destroy us.  None of us has escaped this disease and it infects all of our hearts.  Sin is the reason for so much brokenness, suffering, anger, and pain.     We are always trying to remove the burden of conviction and convince ourselves we are ok when we have chosen to be disloyal to you, rebellious to your authority, and resistant to your call.  We buy into the lie that we can step over your loving and wise moral boundaries without consequences. 

While there are things, we can do that are kind, philanthropic, and have some element of goodness, they don’t overcome the reality of the fallen condition, which is that we are dead in trespasses and sins, so we can’t respond to you and the truth.  We are controlled by the world and the events around us and we are driven by evil desires.  Left to ourselves, we would never want to find you, much less know you.  We are born into this world spiritually dead and by nature hostile to your authority.   In our flesh dwells no good thing and our carnal fleshly mind cannot submit to your Law, making it impossible to please you, and therefore we are by nature, enemies against you and objects of your wrath (rom 8:7). 

GRACE – ROLE OF LAW 

Your law speaks to our conscious, which is the internal perception of your moral law, and sheds light on our sinful hearts, dragging secret sins into the light, and magnifying littles ones to their true size, illuminating our understanding and showing us our need for your grace.  Like batteries in a smoke alarm, it warns our conscious of danger.  Your law is the diagnostic tool and the x ray machine that reveals the sin in our heart and shows us our true nature.  It’s the axe that cuts down the tree of self-righteousness.  It’s the hammer of death and the thunder of your wrath to bring down the proud and shameless hypocrites who trust in their own righteousness. 

It is the preliminary work that must be applied before the gospel can be received.  It’s the plow that breaks up the stony ground in our hearts, so the seed of the gospel can be planted.  It is the surgeon’s scalpel that first cuts and makes us worse, so that we can be made better.  It’s the needle that pierces the heart and makes a way for the thread of the gospel of your grace to be drawn through it, to mend our brokenness. You have given us your law as the key to unlock the door of salvation, because we must be condemned, and convinced as transgressors by it, before we can turn from sin and be cleansed by your grace.  There is no way to have peace without going through the pain of confessing and turning from sin.  Just like antiseptic, it stings before it heals.  Pain must come before the healing.

Your Holy Spirit takes the law and shows us our sin and shows us we don’t meet your righteous standard.  Your spirit shows us our sin so that we can turn from it and then points us to Christ who fulfilled the Law on our behalf.  Whatever the Law says it speaks to those who are under the Law, so that every mouth may be stopped, and the whole world may be held accountable to you.  For by the works of the law no human being will be justified in your sight, since through the Law comes the knowledge of sin (Rom 3:19-20).  Your law does not justify us, it leaves us guilty. Righteousness cannot be achieved by your law and your law cannot impart life.   Your Law is not how we earn our salvation, it is used to show us our need for salvation, because we will all stand before your judgement seat, and we all will have to give an account for our lives, and your 10 commandments are your moral standard by which everyone will be judged by, stopping every mouth, humbling every heart, declaring us all guilty worthy of death, because every soul that sins against you must die.   The Law is not made for a righteous man, but for the lawless and disobedient, for the ungodly and for sinners, for the unholy and profane, for murderers, whoremongers, for those that defile themselves with mankind, for stealers, liars, perjured persons, and any other thing that is contrary to sound doctrine.  (1 Tim 1:9-11). 

The lesson of the law is that none of us our good, we all fall short, our sin is too big, and your bar too high.  We all have evil sinful hearts, and we all need to be rescued from the cancer that resides in us, and your wrath that is to come.   You gave us a law that is impossible to keep, to bring us to a place where we would cast ourselves at the foot of the cross and your mercy, rather than trying to keep it in self-effort. 

Your law lays burdens on us so heavy, in order to bring us to our knees, and drive us to the cross, so they can be lifted off by your gospel.  Your law shows us that we can never deliver ourselves and it crushes any self-righteousness or notion that we can achieve righteousness on our own.   It shows us how helpless and hopeless we are if left to ourselves, so that we would seek your grace.  Your law shows us our need for a savior and drives us to the foot of the cross where we can receive your grace, but your wrath still abides upon every soul who does not place their faith in your son.

Your law is not a curse; it is a gift of your love and grace with its primary purpose being to reveal sin in its full scope, and to foreshadow our need for the gift of righteousness through faith. When the law has done its work as our schoolteacher, we are left totally depleted of self-effort and we open ourselves up to your grace and mercy.  Your Law brings us to the end of our rope, so at the end of it, we will find a strong and willing savior.  Your law did not make anything perfect, but it did bring in a better hope by which we can draw near to you.  (heb 7:19) Your law magnifies your grace and makes the cross explode with light.  

I can delight in your law because its demands drove me to your son, who fulfilled them for me.  Since I am no longer guilty or condemned, let me fearlessly see my sins, ruthlessly hate my sins, and relentlessly repent of my sins.

“The principal point of the law, is not to make us better, but worse, showing us our sin, so that we may be humbled, terrified, bruised, broken, and by this means, driven to seek comfort and to come to that blessed seed.”   

Our salvation is not an agreement between 2 people, so it is not a matter of law, it is a matter of promise.  You gave us your Law to show us our need for a savior, the seed of the promise given to Abraham, given through faith in Christ to all those who believe.  

PENAL SUBSTITUTIONARY AT-ONE-MENT 

But because you are also compassionate, merciful, gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in love, you immediately put a plan in place after the fall to redeem us and you did not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.  You instead sent your son to live the life we couldn’t live, fulfilling the righteous requirements of your holy law on our behalf.  Then he died the death we deserved, taking upon himself the curse of the law, enduring your rejection and receiving your righteous anger, satisfying your wrath against sin, paying the ultimate price, becoming the ultimate sacrifice, becoming the substitute for our failures, all in our place, so that I will never have to face the penalty for my sin and so I can be accepted into your kingdom. 

PROPITIATION 
HIS RIGHTEOUS WRATH & ANGER AGAINST SIN SATISFIED

You punished him for my sin and then treat me as if I lived His life.  Our sins were put on Him and His righteousness was put on us.  The Law imputes guilt on us and shows us that we stand before your holiness, guilty worthy of death, but by your gift of grace, his righteousness was imputed to us.   Just as sin entered the world through Adam, and death through sin, so also death was passed on to all men, because all sinned.  For if, by the trespass of the one man, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive an abundance of grace and of the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ!  He was treated as if He had done everything we had ever done, and at the same moment, we are treated as if we had done everything right.  All the medals, honor, and glory that He deserves, is pinned to our chest and now you honor and see me in Jesus.  He took our rap sheet and gave us his resume.  Allowing us as guilty sinners to be reconciled back to you without compromising your holiness in any way.  You punished sin and, in your love, embraced sinners at the same time, making peace through the blood.  Love and holiness kissed. (ps 85:10). 

The greatest act of love was Jesus suffering your wrath on the cross to save us wretched sinners.  You turned your back on him, so you would never have to turn your back on us.  In His moment of horror, we were given eternal hope.   If you were only holy perfection, I would be too crushed under a sense of inadequacy to change, and if you were only a general spirit of love, I would be too complacent in my sin, but you are a God of holy love.

• He was crucified at 9am and finally died on the cross t(odd) at 3:00pm on a Wednesday, on the 14^th of the month, when he cried out “My God why have you forsaken me?” (Mark 15:34) (1717v in NT).   This was the time of the midday sacrifice for the Jews.  It was also known as the “hour of confession”, and when the veil of the temple was torn in 2 providing us with direct us to God once again. Coming to Christ is not a negation, it is death.  He died so that I may live, and you ask us to lose our life so that we can find life in you. I was born on Valentine’s Day, synonymous with the heart and love, at 3:00pm on a Wednesday, on the 14th.   He endured God’s wrath and died for me, satisfying His righteous anger against my sin, because he loves me and so that I could have life in Him.  (v303) Hebrews 9:26 “by the sacrifice of himself, Jesus satisfied God’s wrath against sin”.

• He received the curse of the law by drinking the bitter and dreadful cup of your divine wrath, in our place, so that we could drink from the cup of salvation and so our joy could be made full. (on the others side would be the joy of being with us.)
• He was willingly cast out, mocked, humiliated, rejected, and despised, in our place, so that we could be accepted and adopted as sons and daughters into your kingdom, and brought back into the fold and into the dance. 
• He was willingly whipped, beaten, scourged, lashed upon, and pierced, in our place, so that we could be healed, restored, and made whole. 
• He was forgotten and forsaken by you on the cross, in our place, so that we could be remembered and fully known by you forever. 
• He faced separation from you on the cross, in our place, so that we could be reconciled and brought back into right relationship with you, and so that we could have fellowship with you once again. 
• He came not to judge, but to be judged and declared guilty, in our place, so that our shame and guilt could be removed and so we could be declared innocent, righteous, justified, and blameless in your sight, and in your courts, . 
• He was disfigured, in our place, so that we could be made beautiful in your sight. 
• He was stripped naked, and his garments were cast, in our place, so that we could be clothed in his righteousness.
• He thirsted on the cross, in our place, so that our thirst could be quenched and so that we could drink from the well of living water.
• His blood was poured out and He emptied himself of his glory (kenosis), so that we could be filled with your spirit.  
• He became poor and lowly, so that I could be rich and exalted in Him
• He came in weakness so that I could find strength in Him
• He willingly lived without an earthly home so that by grace I could be guaranteed a place in the your house forever.
• He entered the dirt and rime and fallenness of creation so that I could be cleansed from unrighteousness, and so my filthy garments could be washed and made white.
• He earned and achieved what I could never do on my own so that I could enter into His rest
• He bore the weight of my sin so that my burden could be made light.

We are now no longer hostile, enemies, or objects of your wrath, but now objects of your grace and love.  He became the mediator between our rebellious hearts and your holiness, and removed the hostility between us, interceding and advocating for us on our behalf.  Through his perfect life, death, and resurrection from the grave (because the grave cannot hold a sinless man) we have been given an eternal hope.  Our physical death now is just an entrance into greater life.  We can now celebrate and drink from the cup of salvation (ps 116:13) because he drank the cup of divine wrath for us.   

JUST- IF – IED NEVER SINNED  

Through faith in His finished work, we are now declared innocent, righteous, and justified and in your courts, no longer under condemnation, because our sins and crimes against you have been forgiven and our debt has been paid.   Our sins have been covered and atoned for before your eyes.  True forgiveness always entails suffering for the forgiver because when someone steals from you, or justice has been violated, then that person owes you, and the only hope of rectifying and righting wrongs, comes from the forgiver absorbing the cost and paying the cost of suffering.  The only way you could pardon us, and not judge us, was to go to the cross and absorb it yourself.  “I must suffer,” Jesus said.

Final judgement is coming, but we can stand before you confidently because your son received your wrath in our place, covering our sins with his righteous blood.     This is how all wrongs will be made right and how you can execute justice by ending evil once and for all, without ending us.  

RECONCILIATION 

Just as you made a way for Israel to cross the Red Sea, escaping bondage and slavery when there was no way,  you have made a way for us to escape the bondage of sin and death, by reconciling us back to yourself through the blood that was shed, giving us eternal life.  The chasm that separated us has been removed and we have been granted access back into your life giving presence. We are now reconciled and brought back into right relationship with and your spirit is working in us restore our image and to transform back into your likeness. 

(When I fall deeply in love, I want to please them, and I don’t wait for them to ask me to do something.  I eagerly research and learn everything about her that makes her happy and then do it for her no matter if it costs me money or if it is a great inconvenience.)  

RELATIONSHIP COMES BEFORE OBEDIENCE – Personal righteousness never precedes personal justification, and relationship (chosen) always comes before obedience. Just as Israel was redeemed from Egypt before they were given the law, just as Abraham was counted as righteous through faith before circumcision.  Christianity is a status and a union, like being adopted or being married, not a reward we get on the basis of our achievement.  We are either married or we are not- we are either a Christian or we are not.  Marriage is based on both Law and love.   When we put saving faith in Christ, our faith “unites our soul to Christ, just as a bride is united with her bridegroom”.  A husband who marries a wife, assumes her debts, and the wife in turn, now shares in his wealth, so our sin and death fall on him, and his righteousness and glory are given to us.  By the wedding ring of faith, the soul that trusts Christ, is free from all sins, secure against death and hell, and given eternal righteousness, life, and salvation.   The legal and vital connect and strengthen each other.  The more we are assured of our legal acceptance, the freer our hearts are from fear and shame, and the more we are drawn to you in joyful love, and the more we experience your love shed abroad on our hearts by your spirit.  

Our salvation in your son is so great, and the blessings so tremendous, that the angels study it intently, and it is what the prophets longed to see.  (1 pet 1:12) The beauty of our salvation is that justice was served and yet we as sinners were redeemed, so that you could be both just, and the justifier of those who believe in you.   There is nothing we did to deserve it and it was only by your sheer grace and mercy.  He is the only way, the truth, and the life, and no man can come to you except through Him, because He alone met your righteous standard, and the requirements and demands of your holy law, being without sin, perfect in thought, word, and deed.  None of our salvation depends on us.  Faith is nothing less than a complete exchange of all that we are for all that He is.  Salvation only comes to people that admit that they are sinners and need grace.  Your mercy allows us to face and admit how messed up we really are.  The way to experience your grace and mercy is through the wound, hurt, brokenness, struggle, addiction, foolishness, and weakness.  It is not through our strength because the strong don’t need a doctor.  Our weakness does not keep us from you.  It is our delusions of strength that does.  The gospel is for the weak, unable, and the foolish and is welcome to people who say, “I can’t”, but say that, running to a redeemer who can.

REDEEMED FROM SLAVERY & BONDAGE 
BOUGHT WITH PRICE

You have rescued us from the idols that are full of lies, that over-promise and under-deliver, and that so easily enslave us, and that make us sacrifice and bring us to nothing.  They are broken cisterns that can never satisfy, but you alone sacrificed for us, and give us the well of living water and eternal life which never runs out.  You did not redeem us from bondage to sin, death, and darkness with gold or silver, but by his precious blood that was shed, reconciling us back to yourself, so that we could begin the process of being made holy and transformed into your likeness.  You have saved us from the penalty of sin, you are saving us from the power of sin, and you will save us from the presence of sin eternally.    

WORKS (DO) vs GRACE (DONE) BASED SALVATION 
MOTIVATIONS & INTENT OF HEART

Your gospel is not advice about what to do, it is historical good news that has already been done, so all we can do is respond to it.  I have been saved by grace, through faith, despite what all I have done, not because of what I have done, or will do, so I pray that do not receive your grace in vain. 

(The 2 enemies of your gospel are self-righteous Legalism, which postures that I can be saved by my own works and righteousness, and Antinomianism (against the law), which teaches that I am freed from the necessity of obeying Mosaic Law.  Legalism doesn’t grasp your grace.  It distorts the law for its proper function as a guide for our lives, a way to become our true selves and to please you and instead turns it into a burdensome system of salvation through which we obligate you to bless us.  Antinomianism does not grasp your loving grace, and also sees the law as an obstacle to freedom and personal growth rather than as the great means by which you grow us into both.)

I pray that I will not be like a horse or mule, who has no understanding and must be curbed with bit and bridle, and will not stay near you (ps 32:9), but rather, I pray my heart will be willingly drawn to your beauty and costly love for me, and that my obedience would be intrinsically motivated, organic, flowing from a joyful heart, in recognition of what I have already been given, resting in what has already been done. 

Not in the hopes of getting something, or trying to secure a blessing from you, or in an attempt to be accepted, or out of obligation, which is externally motivated and mechanical, because then my obedience is anxious and selfish.  Anxious in the fact that I am never sure if I am being good enough, and selfish because I am doing it in order to get something, which leads me to becoming exhausted and trying to attain something that cannot be attained by own effort.     It makes me self-righteous, defensive, and makes me more concerned with other people’s sin instead of my own and that the problem is outside of me, not within me.  It makes me trust in my own righteousness.  The result is always self-righteousness or self-loathing.  Joy without obedience is frivolity.  Obedience without joy is moralism.

The more we obey, the closer we draw near to you, the more spiritually alive we become, and we become more of who you made us to be.  The closer I draw near to you, also makes me more aware of how sinful my heart really is, which then in turn, magnifies how much I have been forgiven, and makes me more loving and compassionate to others, because he who has had much forgiven, loves much, but who has been forgiven little, loves little.  (luke 7:47)

When we disobey, we are unleashing the forces of chaos and disorder, because we are violating your design for us, so help me to live according to your design, so I can become more of who you created me to be, and so I can glorify you more fully.  Although you don’t require from us perfect holiness, you do require from a us a sincere willingness to turn from sin, so help my heart to gaze upon your costly love for me until I am not just sorry for the consequences of sin, but for the sin itself and how it grieves you.    Our obedience celebrates your grace that motivates it, and our obedience is its own reward.   Each moment of submission to your will, celebrates the fact that sin has no dominion over me, and the fact that I am no longer under the law and a child or your wrath, but under the law of righteousness and truth, and a child of your grace.  I am experiencing the riches of your grace when I obey.   I don’t obey to get your attention, but because I am the object of your attention since before the world began.  My obedience does not initiate anything, it only occurs because you initiated a redemptive process in me.

True faith is not just knowing truths about who you are, but trusting you from the heart, and showing saving faith, through a life of obedience and submission to your calling.  We need to do what is in your word, but we really can’t, but there is one who did, and because He did it on our behalf, and in our place, if we believe in Him, we will begin to be able to do it, but only to the degree that we understand what He did for us.  If you demanded righteousness from us, then we are dead, so we don’t give you a righteousness and then you bless us, you give us a perfect righteousness in your son, then I live for Him. 

OUR RELATIONSHIP TO THE LAW – Christ has set us free from Jewish ceremonial laws and regulations, but not obedience to your moral standards.  I pray that I will study, obey, observe, and seek out the intent of the law, so that I can discover the kind of life I should be living, in order to please and resemble the one who created me and redeemed me from the consequences of sin.  We are not saved by your Law; we are saved for your Law.   Your Law is how we regulate our relationship with you, not the way we merit the relationship.   Your Law is not my payment plan, so my obedience should never be a fearful payment, but a hymn of gratitude to you who met me where I was at and did for me what I could have never done for myself.  Our good works then, are not to earn our acceptance, or the cause of our justification, but to demonstrate and show evidence of our faith, and to reveal what you have already declared us to be which is Justified. 

 Your law exposes our sin and shows us our need for the gospel, and then, once we embrace your salvation by faith, the law then becomes the way to know, relate, please, serve, and grow into the likeness of the one who saved us.   The only way we can love your law and take it seriously as David did, is when we actually admit what it demands, and know that it cannot save us, but also knowing there is no condemnation for those that are in Christ.  Your laws are not merely busy work, they are for our good so that we may prosper; they reflect your consummate wisdom; they help us live in such a way that fulfills our designed nature.  Your grace is working in me to make my heart submissive to your authority and to make me find joy in your law.   Draw me closer to you so the remaining sin in me can be exposed and consumed by your grace and by the fire of your holy love.

Your Gospel, which declares we are justified by faith, and not by works of the Law, does not negate your Law in any way, it establishes and magnifies it, because when we place our faith in Christ, who embodied and met the righteous standard of your Law for us, and when we ask for forgiveness of sins, which are transgressions of your law, we are establishing that your Law exists.

Your law is perfect, and it refreshes the soul.  Your statutes are trustworthy, making the simple wise.  Your precepts are right, giving joy to the heart.  Your commands are radiant, giving light to the eyes.  Your decrees are firm and righteous, more precious than pure gold, and sweeter than honey.  Your judgements are true and righteous and by them, your servant is warned, and in keeping the there is great reward.  (Psalm 19:7-11). Your commandment is a lamp, and your law is light.  Blessed are those who walk in your Law (ps 119:1).  Blessed is the one you discipline and teach from your law; you grant them relief from the days of trouble, until the pit is dug for the wicked. (ps 94:12).  Your word have I hid in my heart, that I might not sin against you. (ps 119:11) I will never forget your precepts, for by them you have given me life. (ps 119:93) I delight to do your will, your law is within my heart. (ps 40:8) Let me not wander from your commands because this is how I abide in your love, and it is how I express my love for you, so I pray will keep them and that I will learn to do what is good, right, and pleasing in your sight.     

(When you lay down an animal to be sacrificed, you should be thinking, thinking about what the sacrifice “means”.  You should be thinking if Justice was to be served I should be slain because I don’t love God with all my heart, mind, soul, and strength, or love others as myself.  Don’t let my obedience be mechanical like they were doing in the temple where they were not engaged or thinking, where they had squeezed out communion with God and real reflection on the meaning of the substitutionary sacrifice.  Jesus death was always before him and he always thinking about us.  Water into wine then the overturning of the temple.  Jesus was so concerned that we didn’t understand the meaning of his death, sometimes he shows us what he is doing by adding (wine), other times by throwing the tables over in order to wake us up.  There are a lot of regulations in the bible, but there is another sense in which there is only one, just as Jesus only had one thing in front of him, we only have to have one thing in front of us, that he died for me.  Don’t get caught up in the regulations and miss the relationship.  The one thing that should always be on our mind should be the one thing that was always on his mind.  Are you having trouble forgiving someone right now?  Reflect on the meaning of the sacrifice.  Get all these other things out and reflect, engage, think, and look at what it means. Make it a living thing for you.  If you are having trouble forgiving somebody you are not thinking about my sacrifice means.  Where ever your problems are, you can look for the regulations, but there is actually only one thing, realize what His sacrifice means.  Have it always on your mind so it bring you down when you need it and lift you up when you need it.  You will always be prepared) 

ABIDING IN HIS LOVE

We come to know you and love you through keeping your commands and keeping your word.  That is how love is perfected in us, but whoever does not, the truth is not in him.  (1 john 2:4-5) (jhn 14:15) Your love does not compromise your truth. Love and truth are bound together.  They do not stand in opposition to one another.  Love without holiness is mere sentiment (which is just a thought, opinion, or idea based on a feeling).  Righteousness and Law without grace will turn me into a pharisee, but Your gospel keeps truth and love together. 

Unless you eat the flesh of the son of man and drink his blood, you have no life in you.  Whoever feeds on my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up the last day. Whoever feeds on my flesh and drinks of my blood, abides in me, and I in him (jn 5:53-56)

8Whoever does not love, does not know You, because You are love. 9This is how Your love was revealed among us: You sent your one and onlyc Son into the world, so that we might live through Him. 10And love consists in this: not that we loved You, but that You loved us and sent Your Son as the atoning sacrificed for our sins.  11 if You so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12No one has ever seen You; but if we love one another, You remain in us, and Your love is perfected in us. 13By this we know that we remain in You, and You in us: You have given us of Your Spirit. 14And we have seen and testify that You have sent Your Son to be the Savior of the world.  15If anyone confesses that Jesus is your Son, You abide in him, and he in You. 16And we have come to know and believe the love that You have for us. You are love; whoever abides in love abides in You, and You in him. 17In this way, love has been perfected among us, so that we may have confidence on the day of judgment; for in this world we are just like Him.  18There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear, because fear involves punishment. The one who fears has not been perfected in love. 19We lovee because You first loved us.  (1 jhn 4:7-19)

14We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love our brothers. The one who does not love remains in death.    16By this we know what love is: Jesus laid down His life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. 17If anyone with earthly possessions sees his brother in need, but withholds his compassion from him, how can your love abide in him?  Help me to not love just in word and speech, but in action and truth. So I will know that I belong to the truth, and so I can assure my heart in Your presence: But if my heart condemns me, You are greater than my heart, and You know all things.  But if my heart does not condemn me, I have confidence before You, 22and I will receive from You whatever I ask, because I keep Your commandments and do what is pleasing in Your sight. 23And this is Your commandment: that we should believe in the name of Your Son, Jesus Christ, and we should love one another just as You commanded us. 24Whoever keeps Your commandments remains in You, and You in him. And by this we know that You remain in us: by the Spirit You have given us.  (1 jhn 3:14-24)

4Love is patient, and it is kind. It does not envy or boast.  It is not prideful, rude, self-seeking, or easily angered, and it keeps no account of wrongs. 6Love takes no pleasure in evil but rejoices in the truth. 7It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8Love never fails.  (1 cor 13).  Love lends and expects nothing in return.  Love is self-sacrificing, generous, and unconditional.  Love binds everything together in perfect harmony (col 3:12), love is the fulfilling of the Law (Rom 13:10).   When I am living for myself, the call to love others is always a burden and duty, but true, humble, joyful, and perseverant love is born out of worshipful gratitude.  We love, because you first loved us.

THE UPSIDE – DOWN PARADOXICAL KINGDOM

I ask for your wisdom, knowledge, guidance, understanding, and discernment so that I may better serve you and your kingdom, which turned the world’s value system upside down.  The world tells us to live for ourselves, to consume, obtain, and achieve, but the central organizing principle of your paradoxical kingdom, is that the way to fullness of life is to empty (kenosis) ourselves in (hesed) self-sacrificial love for others, in order to make them whole.  Those who give the most, have the most.  The more you give, the more you will have, and those who keep, will have less and less to hold on to.  Having nothing yet possessing everything.  The smallest of seeds becomes the largest.  The way to reign is to submit.  The way to magnificence of character is through humility. The way up, is to first go down, humbling myself before you, admitting that I am a moral failure, and deserve nothing but your wrath, so that I can be exalted in due time.  The way to true freedom is by following, obeying, serving, and submitting to your commands.  The way to truly be rich is to give my wealth away.  The way to save and preserve my life is to lose it.  The way to find myself is to lose myself in service to you and to others.   If I look for or try to find myself (or my “true” self), I will only find in the long run, hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay, but when I look to Christ, I will find him and everything that my heart truly seeks and needs will be found, which is joy, peace, love, security, and rest.   

We are fools for Christ’s sake, but we are wise in Christ, we are weak, but strong, honorable yet despised, we both hunger and thirst, naked and buffeted, and have no certain dwelling place, and labor working with our own hands being reviled, we bless: being persecuted, we suffer it, being defeated we intreat. (1 cor 4:9-13)

ASSURANCE OF HIS PRESENCE, SOVEREIGNTY, PROVIDENCE & MY SALVATION | COMFORT
HOLY SPIRT WIND & FIRE | HE IS ALWAYS WITH ME | I AM NEVER ALONE | EMMANUAL  

• do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.” (luke 10:18)
• The beast that thou sawest was, and is not; and shall ascend out of the bottomless pit, and go into perdition: and they that dwell on the earth shall wonder, whose names were not written in the book of life from the foundation of the world, when they behold the beast that was, and is not, and yet is. (rev 17:8)
• 27But nothing unclean will ever enter it, nor anyone who does what is detestable or false, but only those who are written in the Lamb’s book of life. (rev 21:27)
  • 
  • How do you know that your name is written in The Book of Life? You do not explore the hidden mind of the Almighty on a mystic quest to read his thoughts. You do not look inward to gauge the cleanliness of your hearts. You look outward, to he who is the Book of Life. God the Father has written your name not in words but in wounds. The nail-pierced hands, the thorn-encircled brow, the spear-hewn side—in those bleeding wounds is the ink by which your name is inscribed.  Before you did anything good or bad, before you were conceived, even before the foundation of the world, God the Father tattooed your name upon the body of his Son. He wrote it in the Book of Life. And in time, he preached to you that, apart from him, you are dead and damned. But by his Spirit, he called you to repentance, he called you by the Gospel, he worked faith in your heart, he baptized you, he forgave you, he made you his child. In other words, he showed you your name, in letters bright and clear, written in the Lamb’s Book of Life.  Do not worry yourself with vain speculations about some hidden, secret decision that God made ages ago about who would be saved. Fix your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, the one in whom God reveals his fullness to us, the Lamb slain from the foundation of the world, the one who wills that all be saved and come to the knowledge of the truth. Read only this Book of Life, Jesus Christ. See your name written there in the waters of baptism, in the forgiveness spoken, in the body and blood of the Supper. Christ Jesus is the Book of Life. In him and him alone our names are written.

303 – The house number on Baptism Card

• I have been praying for the Lord to help me deal with the pain and shame of my past relationships and help me navigate dealing with not being married and not having kids and he showed me this:
  • 303rd day of the year my divorce was finalized which is October 30th or 10/30
  • 303rd verse of New Testament is Matthew 10:30 (911 + 119)
    • 10:30 “But the very hairs of your head are all numbered”
      • 
      • 303rd verse of Deuteronomy which started on the 303rd page in my Bible
        • says “Wherefore Levi has no part nor inheritance with his brethren; the Lord is his inheritance, according as he Lord thy God has promised him.” 
        • 
        • Levi was to devote himself fully to the service of the Lord in the tabernacle and temple.  The purpose of the priests was to instruct Israel in holiness so that the Lord would bless them.
          • 32But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried cares for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord: 33But he that is married cares for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife  35And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare on you, but for that which is comely, and that you may attend on the Lord without distraction. (1 cor 7)
    • 10:31  Fear not therefore, you are of more value than many sparrows. 
    • 10:32  Whoever shall confess me before men, I will confess before my father.
      • 5/3/2020
        • I gave my testimony to small group and that night an extremely rare straight-line windstorm (derecho) knocked out more power than any other time in Nashville’s history.  
      • The holy spirit is like the wind
      • Straight and Narrow

House # on Baptism and Decision cards: 303 & 308 

• 
• (303 + 308 = 611)  Judges 6:11 is the call of Gideon
  • Judges 6:1111Then the angel of the LORD came and sat down under the oak in Ophrah that belonged to Joash the Abiezrite, where his son Gideon was threshing wheat in a winepress to hide it from the Midianites.
    • I teach 6th grade and dad teaches 11th grade. 
    • my devops username that I randomly assigned at work is tomiller0611 
  • Judges 6:12 (6/12) Date of Baptism 12And the angel of the LORD appeared to Gideon and said, “The LORD is with you, O mighty man of valor.”
    • Several of my boys go to Valor high school
  • Gideon cast doubt on the Lord’s presence with Israel and claimed he was unsuited for the task but the angel assured Gideon that He was with him, but Gideon was not content and demanded a sign.
  • The Gideon’s symbol is a two-handled pitcher and torch of fire recalling Gideon’s victory.  A heart symbol fits perfectly over the pitcher and illustrates this concept of the heart burning.
    • 
  • Pops middle name “Huey” means “heart, mind, intelligent, inspiration”
  • 303 verses in Hebrews which was the house # on baptism card
    • Hebrews 6:12 (6/12) Date of Baptism 12so that you may not be sluggish, but imitators of those who through faith and patience inherit the promises. (Imitate Pops faith)
    • Hebrews 13 7Remember your leaders, those who spoke to you the word of God. Consider the outcome of their way of life, and imitate their faith. (Imitate Pops faith)
    • Hebrews 13: 5 Let my conversation be without covetousness, and be content with what I have, for you have said “I will never leave nor forsake thee”

In Psalm 22 the Psalmist feels forsaken and unresponsive to God and in restless agony.  Jesus recited this psalm in his worst moment of agony on the cross. 

Psalm 22: Dear of the Dawn
1 My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?  Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning?

 But in Psalm 23 the psalmist is resting in the care of the ever-attentive good shepherd who cares for his sheep and who personally attends to each of his covenant lambs.  The promise of Psalm 23 was purchased by the price and pain in Psalm 22

“It [Psalm 23] has charmed more griefs to rest than all the philosophy of the world. It has remanded to their dungeon more felon thoughts, more black doubts, more thieving sorrows, than there are sands on the sea-shore. It has comforted the noble host of the poor. It has sung courage to the army of the disappointed. It has poured balm and consolation into the heart of the sick, of captives in dungeons, of widows in their pinching griefs, of orphans in their loneliness. Dying soldiers have died easier as it was read to them; ghastly hospitals have been illuminated; it has visited the prisoner, and broken his chains, and, like Peter’s angel, led him forth in imagination, and sung him back to his home again. It has made the dying Christian slave freer than his master, and consoled those whom, dying, he left behind mourning, not so much that he was gone, as because they were left behind, and could not go, too.” (Henry Ward Beecher, cited in Charles Spurgeon).  “Millions of people have memorized this psalm, even those who have learned few other Scripture portions. Ministers have used it to comfort people who are going through severe personal trials, suffering illness, or dying. For some, the words of this psalm have been the last they have ever uttered in life.” (James Montgomery Boice)

Psalm 23 (W)
1You LORD are my shepherd,

• (the idea behind God’s role as shepherd is of loving care and concern. David found comfort and security in the thought that God cared for him like a shepherd cares for his sheep.)

so I shall not want.

• ( “All my needs are supplied by the LORD, my shepherd. I decide to not desire more than what the LORD, my shepherd gives”)

2You make me to lie down in green pastures.  

• (Green Hills) (The LORD as a shepherd knew how to make David rest when he needed it, just as a literal shepherd would care for his sheep. The implication is that a sheep doesn’t always know what it needs and what is best for itself, and so needs help from the shepherd.)
• (sheep do not lie down easily and will not unless four conditions are met. Because they are timid, they will not lie down if they are afraid. Because they are social animals, they will not lie down if there is friction among the sheep. If flies or parasites trouble them, they will not lie down. Finally, if sheep are anxious about food or hungry, they will not lie down. Rest comes because the shepherd has dealt with fear, friction, flies, and famine)

You lead me beside still waters.

• (Radnor) (green way) The shepherd knows when the sheep needs green pastures, and knows when the sheep needs the still waters. The images are rich with the sense of comfort, care, and rest.

3You restore my soul. 

You lead me in paths of righteousness for your name’s sake. (NarrowGate)

4Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

• (all of life is lived under the shadow of death, and it is the conscious presence of the LORD as shepherd that makes it bearable. One can rightly say that we face only the shadow of death because Jesus took the full reality of death in our place.)
  

I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, (1 7) they comfort me. (verse 300)

• 
• 300th verse of Psalm: for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
  • 300 in Gideon’s Army and Mount of Olives is 300 feet above Jerusalem where Jesus will return
  • 
    • 3:00 pm This was also the time of the midday sacrifice for the Jews
    • 3:00 pm was also known as the “hour of confession”, and when the veil of the temple was torn in 2 providing us with direct access to God once again.
    • 3:00 pm on a Wednesday, on the 14^th of the month, Jesus died on the cross t(odd) when he cried out “My God why have you forsaken me?” quoting psalm 22 (Mark 15:34) (1717v in NT).    1 rod 7 staff 
    • 3:00 pm was when I was born on a Wednesday, on the 14th. on Valentine’s Day, synonymous with the heart and love,
      • Numerous early Christian martyrs were named Valentine.^[17] J.C. Cooper, in The Dictionary of Christianity, writes that Saint Valentine was “a priest of Rome who was imprisoned for succouring persecuted Christians.”
        • 
      • Hearts are the leaves on my tree in front of my house located at 926 gilmore
        • “Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us, for it is written: ‘Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree’” (Gal 3:13).
        • He died for me so that I may live, and you ask us to lose our life so that we can find life in you.
        • (303 + 308 = 611) Rom 6:11 you must also consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus
        • He endured God’s wrath and died for me, satisfying His righteous anger against my sin, because he loves me and so that I could have life in Him.  Coming to Christ is not a negation, it is death.
        • I have been crucified with Christ it is no longer I who lives, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me. (Gal 2:20)
    • 3:00 pm was also referred to as the Shin hour.  Sh’at haShin (‘Shin hour‘) is the last possible moment for any action, usually in a military context. Corresponds to the English expression eleventh hour.   
  • 300 is the numeric value of the Hebrew letter Shin which is shaped like an English W
    • 
  • In Hebrew, this letter stands for one of the names of God. El Shadaii. The Almighty.  It also stands for Shalom, the common Jewish greeting which means “perfect peace.” Represents fire and transformation. It is also the first letter in the Shekinah, which was the Spirit of God that descended upon the earthly tabernacle of the Israelites, the Ruach Ha Kodesh, the consuming fire, and amazingly enough the letter also looks like a fire. Ironically, it also has the shape of a human heart. The lower, larger left ventricle (which supplies the full body) and the smaller right ventricle (which supplies the lungs) are positioned like the lines of the letter Shin. This is said to remind us that we are to love the Lord our God with all of our heart….
    •  
  • On the Mezuzah is the letter Shin to represent the name of God and inside the Mezuzhah is a tiny scroll on which is written, “Hear O Israel, the Lord our God is One Lord……” Deuteronomy 6:4-9. The Mezurah is on the doorpost of every Jewish house.
    • .The Shema: referenced by Jesus in Mark that it is the greatest command.  He desires this more than sacrifices
      • 4Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is One. 5And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart (the seat of the emotions generally and of love in particular;) and with all your soul and with all your strength (understanding).b 6These words I am commanding you today are to be upon your hearts. 7And you shall teach them diligently to your children and speak of them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8Tie them as reminders on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9Write them on the doorposts of your houses and on your gates.  (Deut 6:4-9, 11:18-20)
    • • • 
    • Π  PI = 3.1415926 (House #) Passover Door – Eternal life –  Covered by blood on doorpost of house

5You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;

• A magnificent banquet is provided by a most liberal and benevolent host; who has not only the bounty to feed me, but power to protect me; and, though surrounded by enemies, I sit down to this table with confidence, knowing that I shall feast in perfect security.  Nothing is hurried, there is no confusion, no disturbance, the enemy is at the door and yet God prepares a table, and the Christian sits down and eats as if everything were in perfect peace.” (Spurgeon)

you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.

6Surely^d goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,

•  “These twin guardian angels will always be with me at my back and my beck. Just as when great princes go abroad they must not go unattended, so it is with the believer.” (Spurgeon)

and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever. 

• The 1717th verse of NT (Mark 15:34) Jesus cried out on the cross “My God why have you forsaken me?” (quoting Ps 22)
  • 1717 is my P&I payment on my house now at 926 Gilmore
    • Hebrews 9:26 (house #) “by the sacrifice of himself, Jesus satisfied God’s wrath against sin”.  303 verses in Hebrews which was the house # on baptism card
    • Π  PI = 3.1415926 (House #) Passover Door – Eternal life –  Covered by blood on doorpost of house
      • He was forgotten and forsaken by you on the cross, in my place, so that I could be remembered and known by you forever.
      • I have been bought/purchased with a steep price.  He paid the debt the I could never pay to redeem and ransom me from slavery and bondage to sin, through the shedding of his blood, which is required by law for the remission of sins.  
    • He paid the ultimate payment for me so that my sins could be forgiven and so I could enter into his House and presence. 
    • The house/temple was the place of sacrifice and where our sins are covered.
      • For this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, saith the Lord; I will put my laws into their mind, and write them in their hearts: and I will be to them a God, and they shall be to me a people: (heb 8:10)
      • you yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ (1 pet 2:6)
      • The word became flesh and tabernacled among us (John 1:14)  
      • God has made us the address where he lives through his indwelling spirit.  
      • If anyone loves me he will keep my word and my father will love him and we will come to him and make our home with him. (his presence) (John 14:23)
      • 1“Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God;^a believe also in me. 2In my Father’s house (heaven) are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you?3And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also (john 14)
      • one thing I have asked of the Lord, this is what I desire; to dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the Lord and seek him in his temple. (Psalm 27:4)
      • David’s supreme priority was to dwell in Your house so he could gaze upon your beauty with a steady and sustained focus.
        •  
        • (H1732) David is mentioned 88 times in Psalms, the year of my baptism 88
          • 

        • 7“And to the angel of the church in Philadelphia write: ‘The words of the holy one, the true one, who has the key of David, who opens and no one will shut, who shuts and no one opens.  8“‘I know your works. Behold, I have set before you an open door, which no one is able to shut. I know that you have but little power, and yet you have kept my word and have not denied my name. 9Behold, I will make those of the synagogue of Satan who say that they are Jews and are not, but lie—behold, I will make them come and bow down before your feet, and they will learn that I have loved you. 10Because you have kept my word about patient endurance, I will keep you from the hour of trial that is coming on the whole world, to try those who dwell on the earth. 11I am coming soon. Hold fast what you have, so that no one may seize your crown. 12The one who conquers, I will make him a pillar in the temple of my God. Never shall he go out of it, and I will write on him the name of my God, and the name of the city of my God, the new Jerusalem, which comes down from my God out of heaven, and my own new name. 13He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.’ (rev 3) 

      • 1For we know that if the tent that is our earthly home is destroyed, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. 2For in this tent we groan, longing to put on our heavenly dwelling, 3if indeed by putting it on^a we may not be found naked. 4For while we are still in this tent, we groan, being burdened—not that we would be unclothed, but that we would be further clothed, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. 5He who has prepared us for this very thing is God, who has given us the Spirit as a guarantee. 6So we are always of good courage. We know that while we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord, 7for we walk by faith, not by sight. 8Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord. 9So whether we are at home or away, we make it our aim to please him. 10For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil. (2 cor 5)
    • the House of God represents His presence (ps 42:4 commentary) the house of God means the sanctuary of God where Jehovah dwelt among his people
      • To be in God’s presence is the ultimate reward for the person who is faithful to him (obedient) (ps 42:12 commentary)
      • 1 Ch 16:11 Seek the Lord and his strength, seek his presence continually. (Davids Psalm of thanks)
      • Ps 16:11 you make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fulness of joy; at your right hand there are pleasures forever more.
        • ps 16:11 is the 164th verse of psalms
        • Date of Baptism is the 164th day of year
        • Ephraim mentioned 180x in 164 verses
        • 
      • The greatest gift and treasure you can give me is your presence. 

In Psalm 24 He celebrates the way David brought the Ark into Jerusalem and being able to enter into God’s presence, which we now can because of His perfect Sacrifice.

Psalm 24: A Pure Heart (Undivided devotion)
(verse 303) The earth is the Lord‘s, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.
² For he hath founded it upon the seas, and established it upon the floods.
³ Who shall ascend into the hill of the Lord? or who shall stand in his holy place?
⁴ He that hath clean hands, and a pure heart; who hath not lifted up his soul unto vanity, nor sworn deceitfully.
⁵ He shall receive the blessing from the Lord, and righteousness from the God of his salvation.
(verse 308)  ⁶ This is the generation of them that seek him, that seek thy face, O Jacob. Selah.

• A pure heart. Those who live with integrity, innocent, and who have been cleansed of unworthy motives towards others, who have shown a hunger for God’s will, who have rejected idols, repented, and who wrestle with God in prayer to seek God’s face as Jacob did.

• • • 
  • Now the end of the commandment is love out of a pure heart, and of a good conscience and of a sincere faith (1 tim 1:5)
  • Nothing impure shall enter heaven, only those who have their names written in the Lamb’s Book of Life. (Rev 21:27)
    • 
  • Jesus said true purity is attained when God grants it to the person who hungers and thirsts for it (righteousness).  Complete fulfillment of this divine promise will occur at Jesus return but the identification of His disciples as those who are “pure” shows that dramatic transformation occurs even in this lifetime.  True disciples affirm Jesus Lordship, submit to his authority, and obey his commands.  Jesus insisted that a true disciple is confirmed by living a transformed life made possible by God.

• 
• By faith, knowing God was with Him, went back and confronted Pharaoh.  Apart from his presence, Moses could not do anything.
• Moses chose to be mistreated with the people of God than to enjoy the fleeting pleasure of sin.  He considered the reproach of Christ greater wealth than the treasures of Egypt, for he was looking to the reward ( Heb 11:26)
• 11But Moses asked God, “Who am I, that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?” 12“I will surely be with you,” God said, “and this will be the sign to you that I have sent you: When you have brought the people out of Egypt, all of you will worship God on this mountain.” 13Then Moses asked God, “Suppose I go to the Israelites and say to them, ‘The God of your fathers has sent me to you,’ and they ask me, ‘What is His name?’ What should I tell them?” 14God said to Moses, “I AM WHO I AM. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: ‘I AM has sent me to you.’”  Exodus 3
• 10“Please, Lord,” Moses replied, “I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since You have spoken to Your servant, for I am slow of speech and tongue.” 11And the LORD said to him, “Who gave man his mouth? Or who makes the mute or the deaf, the sighted or the blind? Is it not I, the LORD? 12Now go! I will help you as you speak, and I will teach you what to say.” 13But Moses replied, “Please, Lord, send someone else.”14Then the anger of the LORD burned against Moses, and He said, “Is not Aaron the Levite your brother? I know that he can speak well, and he is now on his way to meet you. When he sees you, he will be glad in his heart. 15You are to speak to him and put the words in his mouth. I will help both of you to speak, and I will teach you what to do. 16He will speak to the people for you. He will be your spokesman, and it will be as if you were God to him. 17But take this staff in your hand so you can perform signs with it.” Exodus 4
• Exodus 6:11 The Lord said to Moses to tell Pharaoh King of Egypt to let the people of Israel go out of his land.  
• Exodus 6:12 But Moses said to the Lord, “Behold, the people of Israel have not listened to me.  How then shall Pharaoh listen to me, for I am of uncircumcised lips?” 
  • Moses feels not only physically unable to speak but also personally unfit or “unclean” to fullfill the task.

Likewise, the apostles trembled in fear after Jesus was crucified but when they received the Holy Spirit, which came from heaven and sounded like a mighty rushing wind, divided tongues as of fire appeared to them and rested on each one them.  They then went out and spoke in other languages as the spirit gave them utterance to spread to the gospel to the nations that had been scattered at the tower of Babel, reversing the judgement that occurred in Genesis 11.

• 
• You are my refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble, therefore I will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at it swelling.  There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy habitation of the Most High, You are in the midst of her; she shall not be moved.  The Lord of Hosts is with us; the God of Jacob our refuge.  Help me to be still, knowing that you are God (ps 46). 
• 5The LORD will deliver them over to you, and you must do to them exactly as I have commanded you. 6Be strong and courageous; do not be afraid or terrified of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.” 7Then Moses called for Joshua and said to him in the presence of all Israel, “Be strong and courageous, for you will go with this people into the land that the LORD swore to their fathers to give them, and you shall give it to them as an inheritance. 8The LORD Himself goes before you; He will be with you. He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid or discouraged.” (Deut 31)
• 7Where can I go to escape Your Spirit? Where can I flee from Your presence? 8If I ascend to the heavens, You are there; if I make my bed in Sheol, You are there.9If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle by the farthest sea,10even there Your hand will guide me; Your right hand will hold me fast. 11If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me, and the light become night around me”—12even the darkness is not dark to You, but the night shines like the day, for darkness is as light to You. 13For You formed my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. 14I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Marvelous are Your works, and I know this very well. 15My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in secret, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.16Your eyes saw my unformed body; all my days were written in Your book and ordained for me before one of them came to be. (Ps 139)
• My help come from you, the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth.  You will not let my foot slip, you watch over me and will not slumber or sleep.  You will watch over my life, both my coming and going, both now and forever. (ps 121)
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I pray that I will be found worthy to escape the things coming upon the earth, and that I will not be plucked out of your hand or blotted out of your book, and that I will be found to be a wise, faithful, humble servant with my lamp burning brightly, abiding in you and living in a way that pleases you, so that when you appear, I will not be ashamed and will have confidence before you when you return.